Headache , still .

Hi Guys .
Im on the iphone & i have absolutely nothin to do .
I've been tweetin , facebook-ing , youtubing etc for HOURS .
I rely too much on the internet . What would happen if there isn't any internet ?! I wouldn't wanna live anymore ...

I'm still havin the headache . The same feelin i had jux now . Wanna throw up but i can't (u know the feelin)
Is it somethin i ate ? Or did i sleep too much / too little ?

It's already 12.18am . I would stay up till 4 or even 5am . Nowadays , i jux can't sleep early . Trust me , i tried .
:/

Talked to Kira about jobs . I think we're gonna apply at shops like Hang Ten or Giordano or whatever . I have roughly around 4 months till school . I gotta start earnin / do somethin cux i'll die from boredom . And it's not as if everyone else is free to go out with me every single day . Bam & the others have work , my friends are gettin ready for their poly/ite while i'm here , shakin my legs .

LOL

Im not complainin tho . Im lovin my free time . But i guess it's a might as well situation . And i don't wanna rely on my Dad for pocket money when sch starts so work it is . Been sucha long time since i worked ... Totally forgot what it feels like . Oh well .

I jux wanna have a bright future .
Hope i can go far with Art .
I might wanna persue overseas cux honestly , there's nothin much i can do here with Arts . I could have picked buisness or whatever but i guess it's my passion that counts . I don't wanna stop doing what i love ,
But if i do get to be an art teacher or smtg , why not ? The pay's good .

But i still wanna be an Art Manager .
Sounds big . lol

We'll see . I'm only 17 (eventho i look older) time'll tell .

Meanwhile , i gotta get a job and spend these 4 months relaxin at the same time cux when sch starts , im gonna e a busy lady ! (says everyone in Laselle)
I'm gonna have to rush here and there and i'll be sleep deprived so i should hibernate while i still can (eventho it's hard cux i'm an insomniac)

Gonna meet Nick tmrw to have lunch together . I have to pass him this vitamin stuff that his mom ordered from my mom anyway . Meetin him again on Saturday .

Hope to meet Bam , Fae & Nina soon !
Awesome people . Love their company .

And i hope Idayo's havin a great time in Bandung with her family ! :D x

<3 Rainn

P.s : outin with AJ cancelled :'(
It's okay , soon !
Besties forever , like DUH much .

Headache .

so this is what i'll look like if i had this hair colour ... I think this is Ash Blonde ...

yeah my editing suck . LOL .

Anyway , i don't know why i'm always having this ... internal feeling .

I feel like i'm about to throw up but nothing's happening and there's always a slight headache .

It's as if , i ate playdoe .. You know the feeling ... ? 

For instance , you see a play doe set and you took it and smell it and you pretend that the smell is what you jux ate ... okay i don't think this sentence made any sense but i feel like that . AND i hate the smell of play doe . It's disgusting . Totally disgusting .

Today sucks . Can we jux skip to tomorrow ? 

I get frustrated when i can't accomplish things perfectly . I was jux about to make a cover <--- i don't know how long i've been wanting to do a cover ... and everyone else had to spoil it .

Especially the two morons .

Jeez .

so i got really , really angry and well , i didn't do it in the end .

Happens all the time .

Why is it so hard for them to jux shut the bloody fuck up ?

FOR 5 WHOLE MINS , they jux had to purposely interrupt and act as if they're not doing anything .

Bloody Hell . You have no idea how pissed i was .

you know what ?  i give up . Give up singing altogether .

Plus im gonna take up a profession that has something to do with Fine Arts anyway .

<3 rainn

Airport .

Sent Aunt and Uncle Back . Pictures suck cux of the stupid camera . Don't know what happened to it .

They're all super blurry .

Wanted to upload Aunt's picture too but it's jux TOO BLURRY .

Worst than the last picture [ on top ]

but i have her picture on the previous post so that's good :D

The airport reminded me of our trip to Turkey last year :') Much misses .

And as we sent them off to the other side , it reminded me off our trip to Beijing ...

Dad says we might be going to Germany soon . Either this year or next year .

Eitherways , i'm stoked .

i <3 travelling to other countries and i love the fact that we'll always go overseas with Bam's family ! 

We're always together <3 <3 <3

Talked with my cousins at Mcd as we eat , Aunt's treat and laughed at random happenings .

I don't know why but we're all jux shy towards one another .

But at least we talked :) That's good ! 

I woke up at 6pm today <--- UNREAL !

But i guess i was really tired . I slept at 5am so that explains it .

okay this is a quick post , my lenses are dyin on me .

<3 Rainn 

Are you still there , Alien ?

A Day out with IDAYO !

Post Title says it all .

Today is GREAT ! 

Finally get to meet Idayo ! I still don't know why i call her that . ha ha . I've been calling her that since high school . [ secondary school sounds boring lol ]

Went to Somerset and then to Orchard ... and then we walked to three different Dr Marts store to find the Mary Jane shoes [ is that what they're called ? ] and we finally found one at Wheelock's place .

Love love love the shoes . She was kinda hesitant at first cux it wasn't the exact one she wanted but after much persuading , she bought it in the end . I'm sure she won't regret it . It's gorgeous .

I'm not really a fan of Dr Marts ... They have gorgeous boots and shoes but i guess i prefer Timberland's ...

Had our dinner and talked about O levels and our journey towards our " success " .

HA HA . 

It sounds as if we're OLD . I mean omg , we're jux 17 ...

i didn't wanna go out today cux im broke but Dad gave me some cash and i am SO , VERY GRATEFUL

:') He has no idea how much it means to me cux i swear , i am totally broke . lol .

We had a lot of free time after that so jux walked around and went to Sephora's . 

I need to get those HD foundations from Make Up Forever ... I HAVE TO ! But i don't think they sell em Smashbox halo[s] :( 

I went around and i don't think there's any but Sephora's HEAVEN for ladies like us , seriously .

And then we went to Watsons to get some items ... and then walked somemore ...

Idayo's going to Bandung [ Indonesia ] in three days' time ! I'm so excited for her cux ...

i have nothing to be excited about anyway . ha ha .

Afterwards , we snapped a few pictures and went back to the East . Sat at Mccafe and had our supper 

and chit chatted like there's no tomorrow . <3

Love outings like this . We don't have to do anything much except talk jux to have fun .

I miss my close friends . I can't wait to meet AJ soon ! <3 have to catch up A LOT .

Idayo says she likes my singing voice . Shucks if only i can believe that . I don't believe in a lot of things .

Cux i lost all faith in myself and my self confidence is still as low as ever .

And i gave up singing . I tried to make covers but i felt like i wasn't good enough so i stopped trying .

I don't even wanna let people hear me sing even if it was jux for fun .

i'd rather face NO criticisms at all . i jux don't like people to judge me or what i do .

I jux don't like it . I mean , nobody likes it but ... i jux ... don't wanna be ...

  oh i don't know how to say it .

So anyway , we talked somemore . I hope she won't forget me when her school starts ! 

Mine's gonna be a long wait cux school starts in AUGUST . Hers [ and also the others ] will start in April .

I am so excited for them all cux ... i wanna start to meet new people and be in a new environment too .

I am jux too excited for my own school to start ! 

 and i need to get a job .

Today's been great . Wouldn't ask for anything more :')

Hope to have more outings with Idayo again !

And also with AJ ! xoxo

What will i ever do without people like em ?!

i don't have a l o t of friends and i'm not popular and shits but i'm jux thankful to have people that i can't live without <3 I don't need to be popular to be happy .

I'm comfortable with the close ones . he he .

Anyways , i SO need to go out with Bam , Fae , Nina and the rest soon ! I don't think i'll ever live without em too ! 

Gonna have to go to Laselle tomorrow to return the documents so that ill have a confirmed spot in the school ! i am so excited <--- i don't know how many times i'm saying this .

Gonna go with Kitty ! Hope i can wake up early cux ... i'm not a morning person ...

Really enjoyed today he he ! 

AND OMG I TOTALLY NEED TO RETURN THE EIGHT BOARDS TO SIGLAP SEC .

i'll be doomed if i don't ! *gasp* 

I hope Mr M doesn't mind ! We've been really caught up ... with ... um ....

<3 Rainn

I'm Lovin It .

I had a dream last night ... 

I dreamt of Zayn Malik <--- SAY WHAT !?

I wasn't even thinkin of him or anything but somehow , the dream was so REAL and i felt like i really touched him . Touch his leg , to be precise and no it wasn't something sexual IF THAT'S  WHAT YOU'RE THINKING . 

Well here's the full story ...

At first the dream was about me being in a classroom full of ... prisoners ? Im not too sure but we were waiting for our "test" of somesort . It was too scary but what i felt in the dream , wasn't fear , i felt ... nothing .

It was as if , i jux wanted to get the test done and over with . They showed us a video of what the test is gonna be like and it was as if ... i was in Hell . But of course , nothing can be compared to hell but the test involved fire rituals and stuffs like that ...but that part of the dream was super short and i quickly went to the next dream [ in a sequence ] ... 

It was outdoors , there was a stage ... It wasn't a well built stage . Jux a random stage with failed curtains , you know , those cheap stages ...

Anyway , Zayn was singing ! There were a few other people who really looked like his kind ... you know , those Pakistani look ... or they might be Turkish [ but Zayn isnt , duh ] ...

The people behind him were playing those mini drums and shakers or whatever and they're jux puttin on a fun show for passers by who feel bored .

I quickly ran to the front [ it was kinda far ] to take Zayn's picture ... 

I felt so ... normal . In fact , TOO NORMAL . If i really did see Zayn right now , i would faint but the fact that i didn't faint , makes it all weird .

So i ran anyways , went directly infront of him [ the stage was kinda low and there weren't a lot of people . Jux a few bored peeps ] and Zayn saw what i was trying to do and he kept being cheeky , he kept covering his face and looking away jux to annoy me but i wasn't even annoyed ! 

I begged him to stay still while i tried to snap a picture . I don't remember what camera i was using but 

it REFUSED TO SNAP A PIC !!! I was on the verge of crying cux how can it be ?!

Zayn Malik is directly infront of me and the camera isn't working !

He kept posing the same way cux i told him not to move so he stopped singing but the music kept on playing :') In the end , i got a picture . Not jux one actually but loads ! 

But i didn't take one WITH him . 

In the end , i hugged his legs and ran off .

why legs ? Well he was sitting down and i could only reach his legs cux they were like dangling from the stage [ okay that sounds extremely wrong but i can't explain it ] 

And he smiled as i ran off .

WHY DID I EVEN RUN !?

I woke up , expecting his pictures on my camera but of course i didn't check cux it was all a dream :(

But honestly , if felt REAL ! And Zayn looks even better in my dream ! It is definitely weird cux i've never had a dream on celebrities and to dream of Zayn is jux ... a blessing .

I've never met him in real life and i doubt i ever will <--- sigh ... but at least i met him in my dreams !

<3 

Zayn Malik is jux beautiful and i doubt there's anyone else that looks like him . He is TOO PERFECT .

Remember , this was all a dream , don't get excited about it ... 

i should prolly tell myself that lol .

- - - 

Went out with Nick today . Didn't do much . Applied for a job at _______ can't tell ya .

ha ha . Hopefully i get the job cux i'm dying to work at those kind of places . I jux want the experience and since i'm gonna be free for the next four months , it's a might-as -well-work kinda thing .

I might as well   EARN while i can .

Afterwards , went to Tamp with Nick to jux chill at Mcd cux we had nothing much to do .

Sat and watched stupid videos on Youtube . Had a great time LAUGHING MY ASS OFF .

When we were going out of Mcds , there were a l o t of people staring at us .

I really don't know whether it's jux me or not but why is everyone staring at me ?!

I'm not blind , i can totally see it but ... maybe i'm jux paranoid . Maybe they're jux ... zoning out and their eyes are already at where i was ?

Maybe .

Went home early . Got back at 9.15pm ... told Mom to cook me something cux i was famished .

he he . i love what she cooked . I don't know what it's called . . . 

But it did involve noodles .

Im not a big fan of noodles but im definitely a fan of what she cooked .

Anyways , i really , really hope i get the job cux i really wanna do something while i can .

I wanna start earning again and i wanna see how i'll manage myself there lol .

It doesn't require much effort to work there i guess ...

<3 Rainn

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