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19 June, 2019

A walk to remember

Today's Raya walk (lol the literal translation of Jalan Raya sounds off) has been pretty nice. I've been feeling a little off and uneasy for the past few days so i figured this outing could be a good distraction for myself. From myself.

I wish i could explain what i'm feeling in words. I don't know what's causing it or what's triggering it but i'm hoping it goes away soon. I'm tired of feeling uneasy. It's mentally draining.

I haven't been writing on here because i've been struggling to string words together. I would type something and delete them soon after.

The "Social Media Cleanse" did not work.
Or maybe it did in the beginning just like everything else i've tried. It's hard to find a cure for something you don't even know about to be honest.

It's currently 4am. I've got to be up by 7am. I'm grateful i'm on the morning shift. I'll get to go home early and hibernate. Sleep usually makes me feel slightly better but this time, it doesn't. I am struggling to keep it together but what else am i gonna do? What else am i supposed to even do.

I don't enjoy feeling this way. It makes me feel ungrateful. It makes me feel like i'm not thankful for the things i have around me. I have so much gratitude for everything and everyone that i have in my life. I shouldn't feel like this.

It's probably just a phase.

Just like a bad weather.

It'll pass.