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13 December, 2019
A day to remember...
17 November, 2019
hello friends
29 July, 2019
19 June, 2019
A walk to remember
Today's Raya walk (lol the literal translation of Jalan Raya sounds off) has been pretty nice. I've been feeling a little off and uneasy for the past few days so i figured this outing could be a good distraction for myself. From myself.
I wish i could explain what i'm feeling in words. I don't know what's causing it or what's triggering it but i'm hoping it goes away soon. I'm tired of feeling uneasy. It's mentally draining.
I haven't been writing on here because i've been struggling to string words together. I would type something and delete them soon after.
The "Social Media Cleanse" did not work.
Or maybe it did in the beginning just like everything else i've tried. It's hard to find a cure for something you don't even know about to be honest.
It's currently 4am. I've got to be up by 7am. I'm grateful i'm on the morning shift. I'll get to go home early and hibernate. Sleep usually makes me feel slightly better but this time, it doesn't. I am struggling to keep it together but what else am i gonna do? What else am i supposed to even do.
I don't enjoy feeling this way. It makes me feel ungrateful. It makes me feel like i'm not thankful for the things i have around me. I have so much gratitude for everything and everyone that i have in my life. I shouldn't feel like this.
It's probably just a phase.
Just like a bad weather.
It'll pass.
29 March, 2019
Greetings from my bed
2019 was supposed to be a year full of self-growth but...
I feel like i'm going backwards.
I had a cold brew today. Who am i?
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It's currently 2.22am and i have to be up by 8am for a meeting at Nafa. I'm not sure what it's called but it's a session full of potential interns presenting their works and themselves. I will probably be asleep with my eyes open. It is an extreme sport that i'm willing to risk.
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I need to find ways to really give my 110% to the kids. Lately i feel like i'm at 90ish %. I need to polish my skills for workshops and PF classes too. I've been painting so much that i feel so out of touch with pen drawings. I used to work with a lot of pen and ink during sec school and lasalle days. I used to be someone who hated using pencils but boy, look at me now.
I am a changed woman.
Haha.
We're entering April already. I feel like we just started March. Where did all the time go? Soon our new studio will be opened and who knows what else will come in the future.
2019 has been full of surprises though, not gonna lie. I'm grateful regardless of the mixed experiences. Bad ones give us lessons and good ones give us hope.
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Heading to Malaysia with Dee & Lily soon. We need a proper break. I'll be headin to Penang with Mom and Dad afterwards though. Gonna be pretty strange without my sisters there but oh well, there's a first for most things.
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I'm still pretty much, introverted. I spend most of my days recharging. I haven't been reading or writing much but i definitely found new inspirations. I just need to push myself a little harder for this to work.
26 February, 2019
Light
2019 has been... Different.
But different's good sometimes.
I'm grateful for everything, regardless.
The good, the bad and the in-betweens.
X
26 January, 2019
Won't be the last time
I am so happy with "Don't Cry" by Emarosa. They are going for a change in style altogether but when this song came out, i hear a lil bit of 131 and i just...
I just love it.
I guess one can never fully change themselves completely. There's always that thing or two that makes a person more... authentic? I don't really know how to explain it but you get what i mean.
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My Saturdays are gonna be a lil more challenging at work. I'm taking more classes and i can already imagine the exhaustion.
I am already exhausted enough.
Will probably head back to Lasalle for a short course (work related) some time in March or April. I honestly don't know how to feel about going back regardless of the duration of the course. I am still very much traumatised by my entire experience whilst studying there. I'm sure it would be different this time round but...
I don't want to remember how i felt.
I can't go there right now.