2012

Fail Day

2012-01-31T08:03:00.000-08:00

Bam and i went out for a guitar session ... Our main aim is to make a cover .

Just a plain , decent and nice cover ... but we failed :'(

WHY IS IT ALWAYS LIKE THIS ?!

We can't seem to just make it work .

I see all those Youtubers makin covers of various songs IN THE SAME DAY and we're struggling to even cover ONE stinkin SONG .

yes . i am pissed .

So in the end , we chilled , played the guitar more [ without takin a video ] and do what we do best - Camwhore .

i feel bad cux i lost all my mood and the pictures i took of Bam were HORRENDOUS and the pictures she took for me were nice :0

Sorry Bam !

okay i don't know why my head is naturally tilted to the right in pictures . HA HA

looked up cause i saw an Eagle ... - pic below

A L O T of my pictures instead of Bam cux i took ugly photos :(

I wasn't in the mood and i was pissed so yes .

Because of the really GREAT EFFECT called POP ART , the colours are naturally brighter and happier and we don't have to even edit anything !

I don't even know when was the last time i edit the lightings of my pictures .

With Olympus , i can like snap all i want without needing to adjust the lighting or whatsoever !

No edits at all !

i look so much better in pictures . i swear . All thanks to Olympus or any DSLR cameras .

It's kinda natural cux DSLR[s] make people look better . Apparently , they lie . : (

Anyway , i'm spending most of my time in school and out with Bam and the others .

IT's either i'm makin artworks OR music .

Well atleast they're all "productive" . . .

today i finally got the wood for wood burning . I've drawn out the design but it's incomplete .

Mr M gave us an A3 size ! im kinda worried cause what if i don't have time to finish it ?

My interview's in one month's time !

But i'm sure i will :)

i have to work twice as hard cause HELL NO AM I GOING TO NANYANG POLY UNDER INDUSTRIAL DESIGN .

i mean ... SERIOUSLY .

yeah , i still have a plan B to fall back on but industrial design ? i keep thinkin about how sucky it's gonna be .

yes i like to draw , yes i like to invest a lot of time in designs but ... industrial design ?

no no ...

n e v a ...

Art and applied science together = DNT .

bottom line is : HELL NO .

Laselle is still my first choice and if don't get in ... i really don't know what to say ...

but im thinkin of going to MDIS for Diploma in Psychology ...

i can get the diploma for ONE YEAR ONLY !

i don't have to waste 3 years ... unless i keep failing .

3 years' of education into 16 months = brain explode

but i've always wanted Psychology but it has always been ... an underground wish cux i don't want people to comment and all but since Bam and Fae are gonna take the same course , why don't i do the same ?

since i also have the interest ...

BUT Laselle is still my first choice

i'll work my damn ass off for the porfolio .

<3 Rainn

29th / 30th January

2012-01-29T18:05:00.000-08:00

It was Dad's birthday on the 29th but we had a photoshoot on the day itself so we celebrated his birthday by having a cake on the 28th :D

Delicious cake !

I didn't get him anything though :(

Not yet cux i really don't know what he wants ...

The photoshoot was fine ... Thank God the girl in purple came cux if not , i would have to replaced a missing model AND HELL NO TO THAT .

The girls were gorgeous !

I was there to help em out with the dresses and everything else .

The fun part was the FOOD ! We had free food and transport so it was okay !

The fitting took FOREVER and i waited there like a fool . : /

But i took pics of flowers to keep myself entertained . Flowers are interesting ...no matter how fake they are .

i took pics of the girls BEHIND THE SCENE .

a lot of people wanted to take pictures with em ladies !

Well , i would totally do it if i were a guy ...

we started as early as 9am and ended at 8pm . TIRING MAXIMUM !

i wanted to drop dead already . In the end we took a cab home and i jumped on my bed and the night ended just like that ...

- - -

JAE RESULTS ARE OUT !

i got into Nanyang Poly - Industrial Design .

i mean , how random can that get ?! ha ha .

poly is my plan b route .

Let's say , if i don't get into Laselle , i'll go to this course then .

I don't really mind cux atleast i have something to focus on from now on : )

Industrial design is SO NOT MY TYPE . i mean , it has the word " design " in it but im gonna be designing things like seats ... telephones ... stuffs like that ...

weird .

Really , really , really hope i'll get into Laselle .

I won't know till early March so wish me luck ?

<3 Rainn

Jeez .

2012-01-28T08:23:00.000-08:00

I will not let anyone come and ruin my life and leave just like that .

i promise you that .

You do shit to me i do the same .

Bollywood craze .

2012-01-27T03:14:00.000-08:00

This Movie is called " Kal Ho Naa Ho " which means "Tomorrow might never come" [ or something like that ] .

It's been my favourite Bollywood movie since i was so little !

My cousins and i would weep over the saddest part of the movie over and over even though we've watched it countless times ! :')

This is a GREAT MOVIE and everyone should watch it .

Before i die , i would love to meet Shahrukh Khan <3

His acting skills are superb ! Not only in Kal Ho Naa Ho but also in other movies like " My name is Khan " and more !

Love the theme song which is why i'm listening to it now .

The show's like , 9 years old but i still love every bit of it .

I can tear up while listening to just the song even though i don't really know what he's saying . ha ha .

isn't he DREAMY ?!

He's gonna be 47 this year and he's married with two kids !

I mean , he's already a dad and he's entering the fifties but O M G ,

He's STILL DREAMY .

he's not only an actor , but a producer AND a television presenter !

He's in over 80 films altogether !

GOSH !

I mean , DUH , he's AMAZING , what else is there to say ?

I don't know why he looks young . He does work out and all ... which is prolly why he looks young .

Damn imagine if i had him as my Dad ! i mean WOAH .

or him as my husband :')

imagine that .

ha ha .

tsk i'm only 17 ...

- - -

Anyway , Raudhy and i went to school just now to work on our portfolios [ as usual ] but we totally came on the wrong day cux we had to help out on A L O T OF THINGS .

there were so many things to carry and we had to dismantle this large frames and clean em inside out and we had to fix em all again and then take it out again cux we didn't listen close enough and then my finger bled : /

ARGH . I almost died from exhaustion .

Gladys and Farah helped out too and then Farisah came and did the same : )

So at least the workload was divided equally .

Girl Power !

i tried drawing a baby without a picture : / it was hard . in the end i threw it away cux it looked ... scary .

yes i know it's bloody annoying when the camera goes out of focus .

AND i like to use the pop art effect cux it makes my hair look damn nice . Especially the colour .

BUT MY HAIR'S JUST BROWN .

orange is so last year .

im into humble colours now :D

brown will do .

Tiring Day but im almost done with my design for the wood burning . Gonna get it done and finish it ASAP !

i'm only left with one month !

i can do this .

Might be going to school tomorrow . YES , on a freakin Saturday ...

<3 Rainn

hafta keep myself busy yknow .

self proclaimed photoshoot

2012-01-25T07:32:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was really , really fun .

Bam , Nick and i decided to ... have a mini photoshoot cux we were really bored !

But it was great cux the pictures were awesome and i look good [ ehem ]

NO EDITS .

*Great means ACCEPTABLE LOOKING <-- my definition*

didn't upload ALL the pictures here cux we took a lot !

But they're all on facebook . Add me if you wanna see it .

Rainn Ing <--- you know it's me .

Afterwards , Ferr joined us at BK . Bumped into a lot of people that day and they were nice to say HI !

today i went to school . Mr M says we can do the wood burning so now we're working on the design !

im so happy cux i really want to do that thing ! :D

It'll add more variety to my portfolio :)

so far the portfolio's been great .

February's ending and i'll have another whole month till the interview for Laselle .

i'll do my very best to get in , i promise you that .

OH extra note : The Camera effect [ pop art on olympus ] made my hair look orange so i have to say this again . MY HAIR IS JUST BROWN . It's not orange becux orange is so last year for me .

Follow me on Twitter .

Rainn_Ing

<3 Rainn

i was trying to be nice . i mean , if you don't want any help , just say it .

There are billions of people that needs my help so if you don't want it , it's your loss .

Chinese new years' Eve

2012-01-22T07:24:00.000-08:00

Ello Everyone !

Happy Chinese New Years' Eve !

i'm sure all the chinese people are doing all those last minute shopping for the big day .

I'm sure they're gonna have lotsa fun AND lotsa m o n e y [ red packets ]

Went out with Bam , Nick , Moosey , SunFiq , Ferr & Kira to White Sands and to Tamp .

Atfirst it was just us three [ Bam , Nick and i ] There were lotsa weird people today .

Three white angmoh dudes kept STARING AT US !

in the end , they took a picture of us and it was so obvious 0.0

I got kinda scared ... But we kept our distance . I think they were drunk cux they had a lot to drink eventhough they were at Mcd ...

An old Chinese dude sat with us for a while and kept "flirting" with Bam ... It was very scary cux he kept asking personal quetions but Bam lied .

Smart Girl .

In the end he went off , thank God ..

Afterwards , another dude , im not sure of the race though , he sat at the next table and had his seat facing us ... so all the way , he kept looking at us as if he was expecting something great to happen .

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO THE WORLD ?

Oh and i think i saw Irsyad [ AJ's friend which is also my friend , i think ha ha ] with his group of friends .

They kept looking at me ! Jeez . At least say hi or something ... I didn't wanna like , embarrass myself so i just looked away and pretended to see nothing . :( I feel bad but what if it wasn't him ?!

What if the dude isn't Irsyad ?

A lot of shops were closed . Made me really annoyed cux we didn't know what to do ...

And it was raining so we couldn't really go to the park ...

so we just walked aimlessly . Went to Tamp , expecting Food Culture to be open BUT IT WASN'T :'(

So we walked around somemore and took random pictures in the arcade and outside it .

It wasn't exactly fun but it wasn't exactly boring either .

In the end , we went to 711's to get some food and drinks . Ferr , Nick and I went home after that while the rest went back to White Sands ...

Pictures are with Bam so i guess i'll upload em only tomorrow :(

- - -

YESTERDAY , Nick , Ferr and i went shopping .

i didn't have anything at Mcd cux i am really , really tired of fast food .

boo to the blurry pictures . :(

Ferr and i got our lunch at Food Culture , Tampines . We had Ban Mian ! Really , really love it .

Everytime i go there , i'll have the same thing over and over . Other places do sell Ban Mian but theirs ain't as nice as FC'S . You guys should try it , really .

$4.50 for chicken , $5 for Fish . For me , i like the one with the fish but both are great .

AND it is totally worth your money ! A big bowl with lotsa noodles and usually i'll take sucha long time to finish it cux of the amount . Really , really like it a lot :)

After that , Nick came and joined us . Soon , we went off to Bugis . The train got delayed a lot of times ! :(

We had to get out of it cux the train wasn't working well and when the next one came in , it got stuck again .

JEEZ . Somebody go fix the trains already ...

so many faults .

We went to Bras Basah cux Nick wanted to get old books and then we went to Bugis Junction and Street .

Afiqah Sam saw me but i didn't see her ! Damn it is really embarrassin cux i was wearing something so out of the blue and it's called " LAZY WEAR " and i wasn't looking great at all :(

Note to self : Try to look great at all times .

So anyway , i didn't really buy a lot of things . Just a top , a bag and shoes ...

I wanted to get the top i saw a few weeks ago but i couldn't find it :'(

Shucks . Maybe next time ...

I think i should get a job . HA HA .

i mean , seriously . But im loving my free time . I've never felt so free . As free as a bird .

i love the feeling yknow .

i was always occupied with things .

Like studies , school and work .

I had to juggle three things together in sec three and four .

I had enough of em .

I did my best and i passed my o levels and I NEED A LONG BREAK OKAY .

oh and my L1R4 is .. .actually 17 ...

cux i can combine certs -..-

but it doesnt matter cux i've applied to Laselle and the polys .

So far no calls for the polys :'( Im kinda scared .

But i guess i'll accept whatever .

AND my first choice is definitely Laselle !

I will make sure , i do well for the Interview . I'll do whatever it takes .

I promise you that .

<3 Rainn .

We can be thankful

2012-01-20T21:33:00.000-08:00

had such a long day yesterday !

Planned to meet Nick & Bam BUT we had to go to Fitting :(

It took so long ! But we met the other models too and they're really nice AND super pretty .

One of em looked like Agnes Monica *shocks*

oh and incase you're wondering ...

IM NOT THE MODEL .

NO . NO . AND . NO .

I hate it when people force me to do something i really don't wanna do .

I mean , it's fun to take pictures and all but as a profession , no no .

Firstly , I HAVE NO CONFIDENCE ...

secondly , IM FUCKING UGLY ...

thirdly , IM A DIVA .

ha ha ha . okay so the third one was a joke from Ferina : / Cux she wanted me to become one etc and i kept declining and therefore , IM A DIVA ...

so anyway , I brought Kitty along cux obviously she's model material . Kira & Bam too .

I just accompanied em . They're gonna be modelling for wedding dresses and some other dresses for a magazine . The company's quite new [ they're entering two years ] .

I was really , really tired and hungry yesterday ... AND they ordered pizzas ! :')

They had to try on clothes and more clothes and the leader or whatever you call em , talked to all of us about the importance of taking care of our image , the usual things ...

I got really bored after a while ... so i started to walk around ... and do some vogue poses HA HA HA .

AND TWO OF EM SAW ME DOING IT . JEEZ .

EMBARRASSING x ONE BILLION .

And they kept smiling and nodding to encourage . umm ...

in my defense , i was bored .

lol i look horrible but it's okay . This is the only pic i found on Mom's Facebook page ...

The caption read " Amazing models in the making "

only the three of em ! NOT ME :)

so when the rest had their dresses on , i just chilled . he he .

the thing lasted till 11pm ! i was exhausted from all the walking around .

A few asked me on why i didn't wanna join in the modelling thing ...

and i just smiled and said no thanks ...

yep , confidence issue .

and i won't let anyone touch my hair 0.0

<3 rainn

going out with Nick and Ferr today ! I gotta find shoes :D

Mom and her friends [ Bam too ] are at Batam now enjoying their spa ! : /

GERR .

That ain't fair ...

but nothing is so ...

he he.

stay tuned always .

OH OH .

follow me on twitter

.Rainn_Ing

Sunny Day

2012-01-19T00:08:00.000-08:00

Random pix from the itouch .

just got back home from the clinic . Ferr's eyes are r e d & i t c h y .

we had Mcdonald's for lunch !

I think i've gained a lot of weight . Not that it matters ...

I've been eating and eating and eating for the past two days .

I think it's cux i miss Dad's cooking . he he .

i should stop . 0.0 really .

Even Kira & Ferr are amazed . Usually i won't eat much cux the chewing process is so tiring for me ...

[ weird statement but true story ]

So anyway , i might be going back to Siglap Sec tomorrow cux of the CNY celebrations and also becux Kitty wants her copy of the testimonial ...

- - -

i think im gonna make a cover today but i'm sure it'll be a failed one cux im always unsatisfied . :/

why am i always like that ? lol .

I found out that a lot of teachers had been asking Ferr about my results and where am i going .

They prolly think i flunked . -..-

Oh and i found out that i can combine my certs which means ... my L1R4 is actually 17 ...

cux hml and ml are two different papers that i took in different years ...

so it's 3,3,3,3,5,7,7 <---- if you know what i mean .

But the points doesn't really matter cux i've applied to the poly courses already and i've already applied to Laselle . I really , really hope for the best [ which is obviously Laselle cux i love art ] .

Hopefully the interview will go smoothly :)

My interview date is gonna be on the same date as Raudhy , Kitty and Dinah BUT kitty's timing is different !

oh no ...

All of us got 2pm but hers is 4pm ...

But i think it's possible for her to change the timing ... After all , anything's possible nowadays ...

- - -

i am so full omg .

i still don't know how tumblr works . I think im sticking to blogger . ha ha .

Blogger is user friendly . I mean , Tumblr is too , but for newbies like me , it's tough .

but if you wanna follow me , do it now cux i have no followers . HA HA . too cool .

www.rainn-ing.tumblr.com

Gonna go to Seoul Garden with Idayo , Aliyah & Arini next week ! Excited !

Naadiah and Saliza's coming too , i think .

I hope everyone turns up cux it's time to catch up don't you think ?

Better to catch up now before i go m.i.a later on ...

Maybe going shopping wtih Ferr this weekend . . .

I'm in need of new tops ... and shoes .

NEED not WANT .

okay maybe both .

Okay then , im gonna draw now .

see ya when i see ya : )

Follow me on Twitter .

Rainn_ing <--- you know where to find me .

<3 RAINN

Back to school - AGAIN

2012-01-18T00:37:00.000-08:00

Kitty & i went to school to take pics of our artworks AND to take a look at the new art studio.

The Art studio is great ! The only thing that's missing is an aircon ...

But really , the artworks from the past years are AMAZING .

:')

Art is Great .

one of my boards . I don't wanna upload more of it . ha ha .

i am a fan of this artwork above :D

SO enjoy the pictures !

A lot of teachers commented on my hair :')

And a lot of students kept staring at me ... calm yo tits people , i'm no stranger ...

So Mr M invited us to the opening of the gallery / studio in February . Sure i'm gonna come :)

And he told us to come back to celebrate CNY on Friday ...

HA HA .

i mean , sure ... why not but it's a lil odd .

This year's great for Siglap . Everything's turning new and ex - students can come back without being quetioned !

so anyway ... i'm broke today . ha ha : /

Have to get my ass to Tamp later to meet AJ and pass her this documents she told me to print .

Shucks i'm so tired ! I slept at 5am mind you peeps !

Hopefully Kitty's coming a long cux i don't wanna go alone ...

<3 Rainn

Out with Kitty & AJ

2012-01-16T23:01:00.000-08:00

So i registered for Laselle's College of the Arts already !

My interview's gonna be on the 2nd of March . Still a long way to go but i really , really hope i get accepted cux ... i can't imagine myself not doing art for the rest of my life !

And i want to try new things . I really hope i get into Laselle . New school , new start , new beginning .

BUT if i do get accepted , school's start in AUGUST .

yes , AUGUST .

August is pretty darn far from now cux it's only January but time will fly for sure and next thing you know , it's already 2013 ... if there is a 2013 ...

We took such a long time to get to Laselle & Nafa cux we didn't really know how to get there .

Even the map couldn't help us ha ha . JEEZ .

In the end , the two schools were so close to each other and we found out that we walked an entire ROUND . - ____ - It's okay , we know how to get there now .

After everything's done , Kitty left cux she had some matters to attend to so AJ & i ate at KFC and then we went to Vivo City ... After that ... we went to Sentosa . HA HA .

yes , we were bored . But it was really , really fun ! :)

We get to see the gorgeous sunset .

gorgeous ain't it ?

the light in the middle of nowhere = ANNOYING .

okay i really like this pic cux of the effect and all .

Afterwards , we sat for a while , and AJ tried to take pics with my camera but she didn't know how to focus it so the thing went crazy . ha ha ha .

She met her friends after that and i went home cux my legs were killing me : (

It was very , very fun .

Didn't get to take pictures with Kitty cux she went off to fast :(

But it's okay . It's not as if this is the last outing . ha ha .

i'm sure we'll go out often .

i mean like , d u h ?

so anyway , my interview for Laselle's on the same date as Raudhy and Dinah !

HA HA .

i was like " um , can my interview be on march ? ... 2nd march to be exact " and she wrote it down .

Didn't know it was that easy ...

I know i won't get a nervous breakdown cux they're gonna be there together with me ! :)

And i heard that we must talk a l o t ... That won't be a problem for me cux ...

i talk a lot , naturally ... sometimes too much that people have to like , shut me out .

All i have to do now is to gather my drawings to make it into a portfolio .

I can use the o level's 8 boards but ... i'm just drawing more incase . My boards ain't THAT strong

and i only scored a B3 for it ... -__________-

OH and Dad's SUPER DISAPPOINTED WITH MY ART GRADE .

:'(

Sorry , i can't be as good as him . He is a natural when it comes to art .

i'm not a natural . seriously speakin .

Im not Art prodigy .

i'm just someone who really , really loves art .

<3 Rainn

What's in your head ?

2012-01-15T01:54:00.000-08:00

HI !

The computer broke down yesterday and i'm like WHUT ?!

I can die without internet . I mean , there are other ways to go through the net like using the iphone and some other crap but i like the computer just the way it is !

I don't like using the laptops or the tab or the iphone or anything else .

i like my computer and that's that .

I think Ferr fixed it though and it's working just fine ! Thank God !

She's a natural "fixer" .

So i told you about going to NAFA's open house didn't i ? Well i didn't go in the end .

wanna know why ?

CUX I LOST MY WALLET .

i searched the entire house and i turned everything upside down and i still don't know where it is !

Dinah came over to help me look for it too . In the end , i gave up . Kitty & AJ went there instead while Dee & I went to the police to report it . *sigh* Now i have to pay for the missing IC ... and i have to get new ezlink cards and a new bank card ... all my pictures were in there :(

i like that wallet , a lot ...

Incase you guys' found a wallet that's PINK IN COLOUR and it's Lacoste with an i.c inside , two ezlink cards [ adult and student ] , some notes , coins , posb card , a picture of Zayn Malik and also a picture of Delvina and i , PLEASE , PLEASE , PLEASE RETURN IT TO ME !

Dee's been great ! She bought me things and tried to cheer me up :') Thank you so much !

i still feel lost without my wallet . I feel so careless !

And now i've got to replace everything in there AND i've got to get a new wallet .

i am really , really mad at myself . i mean , how did i even lose that thing ?!

It's been in my bag the whole time ... unless someone stole it ...

yes , still uneven hair colour .

I was supposed to go to Nafa with Dee & Raudhy the next day itself since i missed the first one but i couldn't cux of my wallet . Had to run some errands : /

I don't know what's happening to me . I feel so stupid .

I didn't turn up for both the NAFA and Laselle's open house and because of that , i have to pay the $60 tegistration fee . I could have registered for free . -.-

It's just a wrong timing for everything to happen . I swear to God i feel lost without my wallet ...

But it's all good now . After calling Kitty & AJ , i feel relaxed . :)

Thank God i have such great best friends .

We're going to Laselle tomorrow to register and pay and whatever . I hope we can choose the interview dates cux Raudhy & Dee chose theirs . If we get the same date , we'll have to go together and that'll be awesome cux the interview's gonna be as a GROUP . so if we get the same date , we'll get to go to the interview together .

i am really , really interested in Fashion and i thought of taking that but i've chosen Fine Arts .

I already did the online application and i chose it already so i guess i'm gonna stick with it : )

I don't mind actually . I'm fine with anything ! Just as long as it's art - related .

YES i'm not an art prodigy and all and i only got a B3 for O level Art but i guess it's fine .

I'm still growing and i'm still learning new things . Maybe i'm a late bloomer but it's okay .

We'll take baby steps <---- okay i hate saying that

I've already applied to the Polys ... and i'm gonna apply to Laselle tomorrow ... and soon i'll apply to NAFA .

I really , really want to land in an art school .

But if i have to go to a poly , then okay , i will :)

I'll go wherever God takes me cux i trust Him and Only Him .

I really , really hope that AJ , Kitty & i land in the same school ! ^^

Because i can't imagine life without em . They are The Best people i've ever met .

They understand me and i understand them !

We might not be as close anymore this year but i really , really hope we stay in touch !

Anyway , i met up with xxN yesterday night ! I got home at around 6pm and i was drawing my heart out and she called . IT was VERY RANDOM But i agreed anyway since we were both bored .

I felt like a douche already so i went out with my specs and i didn't even bother to comb my hair .

And i don't know what the heck i was wearing .

HA HA .

Guess i'm still not over my missing wallet :'(

please return it to me , whoever you are !

Or please , just randomly pop out of nowhere , into my living room or something !

i won't quetion why or how or what ! I'll just accept it back ...

xxN treated me to the new strawberry frappe from Mccafe ! It was DELICIOUS .

Tastes like cheese cake in liquid form .

okay that sounds gross but you should try it out . It tastes like heaven .

And and and we only got it for 3 bux cause xxN had the picture in the phone for the promotion or something .

Delicious maximum !

Kira bought me that domo cap he he !

Oh OH OH .

i just made Tumblr ! Please follow me ? Cux i have no idea how to follow people and i have no idea how to change every single thing ...

i don't even know how to reblog . : /

It's scary .

www.rainn-ing.tumblr.com <------------ you know it's me cux of my unique name . he he .

" unique "

so today is Sunday and it's a stay-at-home day for me .

The weather's been great ! Very , very , very sunny ! Great for tanning !

Speakin of tanning , i really want to get a tan .

I got fairer and my arms got fairer too .

oh no ...

okay then , i gotta go !

WILL UPDATE SOON !

<3 Rainn

Back to School

2012-01-12T20:02:00.000-08:00

these vases are MADE not BOUGHT ...

BEST PRINCIPAL EVER .

so we came back to school to help arrange the artworks and clean em .

These things are MADE . How amazing is that ?!

The past Siglapians were born to do Art .

Nowadays the students prefer paintings and drawings ...

i don't see us doing vases or lamps or ... frames anymore ! :(

Yeah so i joined Siglap Secondary because of the Arts actually ... but i'm never go be as GREAT as those people who did ceramic works or woodworks or whatever !

I've been in school for three days already and the teachers got curious on why we kept coming . ha ha .

But they didn't scold us or anything . They were actually very ... welcoming .

Since im pretty much jobless , i don't mind coming back almost all the time to help out with the artworks and the new art studio .

Im not coming back today though . Today is CCA day in Siglap Sec . And i don't see any point in coming cux my CCA[s] are GONE . Mdm Su's in charge of Netball now and she was really stressed out when i saw her cux she didn't know what to expect from the netball girls . ha ha . I'm sure she'll be fine ! She handled us , Softball girls , well so she should be okay !

She misses Softball as much as we do AND she wants us to come back to play !

AWW I WOULD TOTALLY COME .

But most of the softball girls are busy with work and other social needs ... but ...

i'm sure they'll agree to it .

okay i don't know what's wrong with me today . I can't seem to type out a proper sentence here .

Anyway , another reason of NOT going to school today is because i'm going to the NAFA open house with Dee , AJ and Kitty today : )

im not really sure how to get there and all but im sure we'll find our way .

Singapore's a small country anyway you can't possibly BE LOST in here .

Will update on the NAFA trip [ if it's interesting ] !

And apologies for the lack of blog updates :(

i've been rather busy !

Yesterday = school till 5pm .

After that , meet Bam till 11.30pm .

BUSY GIRL . he he .

i need to get my English back . I can't seem to talk or type well nowadays .

EEK .

<3 Rainn

Hey

2012-01-11T05:36:00.000-08:00

so 10th January was my birthdate .

It was a boring day , nothing much happened .

Kira gave me a Domo cap as a present ! :D

Other than that , nothing .

We ate dinner together though but it was nothing special .

I'm okay with it cause i was darn tired from school . [ helped Mr M out with art ]

i was testing the camera . Really .

Mom and Dad says they'll get me a cake and we'll eat together soon but not now cause they're busy with work . Really , i'm fine with anything cux i'm busy myself .

okay , i don't even know what i'm busy with . ha ha .

I've applied to Laselle already . Who cares about the 5 credits crap . I've applied it through online and it was accepted so i'll have to go to the building to pay the registration fees and some supporting documents within 7 days of application .

BUT THE THING IS , i don't know what the heck is " supporting documents ".

They sent me an email and they told me to download the pdf file and when i clicked it , it says " UNKNOWN "

i mean , SERIOUSLY ?

i went to the Web page itself and the only thing i found is the supporting documents for INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS so now i'm really lost and annoyed .

i have to hand all those shit up within 7 days and today's already the second day so yes i'm freakin out .

I mean , the thing's gonna get terminated and i can always apply again but ...

ha ha , i just want it to be done and over with . you know the feeling .

i've applied to the JAE thingy too . 12 courses chosen .

And soon i'll be applying for NAFA .

yes , i'm crazy to be applying for all but sometimes you just gotta try .

if i can get to an Art school , i'll be so thankful cause it has always been a dream ...

- - -

today i went to school again . School as in , Siglap Sec .

Mr M wants us to help him with the new art studio and we are told to like , carry the art things and wipe em shiny . It was kinda boring cause there wasn't anything much to do cux the boys did most of the work OOPS . Gonna come back tomorrow .

I'll be there almost all the time so yeah , you know where to find me . ha ha .

AND ...

i noticed that people are suddenly talking to me . I mean , whuttt ?

All this while i've been in school but no one talks to me and now you're all opening up .

lol .

D says " maybe they're all starting to notice you now "

HA HA .

notice my bright hair ?

Oh and i still need to redye it . SUPER UN-ATTRACTIVE .

oh well .

I AM SO TIRED TODAY URGH .

<3 Rainn

Results .

2012-01-09T04:15:00.000-08:00

RESULTS RESULTS RESULTS !

so ... i passed !

:')

Yes , i can't go to Laselle or Nafa because i passed 4 subjects only but i am happy with my results .

And Mr M's helping me with the school im going to so hopefully i'll get a course in poly OR hopefully i'll get through NAFA with his help .

So are you curious to what i got ?

English - B3

HML - B3

Art - B3

Maths - C5

Science - D7

Humans - D7

so i failed two subjects and i cried cause i couldn't get into what i wanted but it's okay :)

I improved so much and i can't believe i did it .

I know everyone's been looking down on me because of how i present myself and because ive been skipping a lot of school for two years but i passed and im happy with it .

21 isn't Great but i did horrible for prelims and i almost skipped the whole year for sec three [ skipped school i mean ] ... I'm glad i bucked up .

im the second higest for HML ! I REALLY , REALLY CAN'T BELIEVE IT .

i cried when Mdm Abd walked past us without looking at us in the eye :(

I thought i did badly ... but i did good :)

And to those who looked down on my malay , HA HA BOO YA .

BOO YA BITCHES .

Yeah i know my Sciences & Maths are kinda atrocious but hey , i passed maths .

he he . from an F9 to a C .

and from an F9 to a D7 for science and Humans .

yeah so i didn't get a distinction BUT SO WHAT ?!

I'm fine with it .

really i am :')

Let's see what'll happen to me in the future . Im not giving up .

Maybe Art school's not for me but i'll just go wherever life takes me !

<3 Rainn

but i'll always love art AND im coming back to school to help Mr M with the art studio and also the art students ? :)

Your worst nightmare's back lol .

Thanks for all the luck !

And to those who really , really looked down on me , i made it . Did you ?

probably not . Cux i saw the points of most of the people ...

God is Great.

Wedding / 2E2'09 class BBQ / Flea

2012-01-08T06:17:00.000-08:00

Hi guys ! So this is prolly gonna be a post full of pictures !

I've been kinda busy so hopefully this post will keep you updated on what i've been up to .

Okay , so it's nothing special .

i'm just an average person . I don't do COOL things like the teenagers nowadays .

Oh well , i'm born to NOT fit in .

On Saturday , my family and also Bam's family went to a wedding celebration . A typical malay wedding but it's kinda nice cux i finally got to see Grandpa's side of the family . His sister really looks like him and i'm totally amazed by that .

Pictures are all unedited . I just used different effects . i like the colourful one but it made me look thrice as orange-y . HA HA .

so i was kinda "late" for the BBQ cux i was supposed to help Raudhy with the chickens but ... i didn't realize it was close to 4 so Dad & i rode his motor bike home .

It was seriously CRAZY . I AM NEVER GONNA RIDE A MOTOR BIKE EVER AGAIN .

He kept speeding and i felt as if i was gonna fall off anytime but i didn't , Thank God .

" You think this is fast ? THIS IS NOTHING ! " - Dad

i really thought i was gonna die and i almost wanted to just cry cux i was too scared for my life .

: / sucha square .

SO afterwards , i just changed into a skirt cux AJ was already on her way and we planned to meet before hand so ... i wore the same top . A lil odd to go to a park with that but oh shucks .

Mdm Chua brought her puppy along ! His name is MILO ! TOO ADORABLE

oh my gosh , i look horrible in this picture with Afiq lol . OH WELL .

ha ha . Why are they so cute ?!

in my defence , i was eating . HA HA

So the bbq was a bit of a failure cux not everyone turned up and the food .. well , we didn't have much variety . But it was FUN ! i mean , really . It's been a while since i saw everyone from school !

AND i love my ex - classmates from 2E2'09 .

They are The Best .

Oh Mdm Chua's dog went a lil crazy and started chasing people around ! IT WAS SO FUNNY !!!

i was TERRIFIED so i kept running away from it and so were the other girls !

:')

Gonna remember that forever .

But Milo is really , really cute and Mdm Chua says he don't bite but ... i don't believe her ...

HA HA .

He looks like a teddy bear ! TOO CUTE but i'm afraid of it so ...

Even though some didn't turn up , it was still fun . It started raining at night and we had to cover ourselves and also the food but it stopped soon after . AJ and i went off at 11.30pm cux she has work the next day .

It would have been better if EVERYONE TURNED UP but sadly no :'(

People like Nasyitah , Morgan , Josiah , Zong Ru ... Indra , Qushairy ... umm who else , Jenna ...

quite a handful actually .

Can't wait for the next Reunion !

some went roller blading while i cycled and Karlina joined in ! ha ha .

It was fun . we were trying to run away from the dog . HA HA .

Gosh .

i <3 1E2'08 & 2E2'09

---

so today [ Sunday ] , Ferr and i went to the Flea at Tamp . Mom was already there with her friends

and she bought a l o t of things ha ha . Major Shopping Spree .

Nick came down too so we all hung out ! Ruls too !

We were bored so we went to the room and we played Bluff . it was really FUN . ha ha .

I kept "bluffing" most of the times but they didn't suspect anything so we just continued .

In the end , somebody just had to spoil my professionalism .

After Mom's satisfied with the things , we went to to have our dinner and then proceed home . : (

i miss my them already !

Okay , not Ferr cux she's here with me now . ha ha .

- - -

TOMORROW IS RESULTS DAY .

don't wanna say anything about this cux i've been waiting and waiting and waiting .

After the results , we have to go to the Art room straight away cux Mr M wants to talk to us .

JEEZ .

i want to cry peacfully , NOT INFRONT OF ALL THE ART STUDENTS AND HIM .

Plus im gonna look horrible with the black spray and shits .

i still can't find my skirt .

DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I CAN FIT INTO IT ANYMORE .

sigh .

Good luck everyone , may the forces be with us <--- okay whut ? HA HA .

<3 Rainn

whatever happens ...

i have to be strong .

formspring.me

2012-01-06T00:50:00.001-08:00

Ask me anything http://www.formspring.me/RainnIng10

Secrets .

2012-01-05T23:25:00.000-08:00

my house is turning into a Boutique . 0.0

Those are old school wedding gowns and they are gorgeous i'm serious ! Nowdays you see people wearing white gowns with the veil and all [ common ! ] . I personally like the blue coloured one , i don't think it's in the picture but i'll snap it fully and show it to you guys . IT really looks unique ! Very Michael Jackson-ish !

AND i wouldn't mind wearing the top just like that if it had no puffy upper part <--- im so pestering mom to take that shit out .

Even though the white gowns are common , Mom has like , A L O T in her room . Her room = our room now cux Ferr & i sorta took over the place . lol .

And do you know how creepy it gets at night ?! The gowns are hangin from above and they're WHITE ...

and when it gets dark ... it'll just look like floating ... ghosts ...

i don't really know why Mom has all these things but she does have photoshoots to promote her make-up on people ? Maybe that's why . . .

Anyway , i really , really want to like , revamp my living room . Change every single thing and make into my own . ha ha. Okay , prolly not my own but atleast change it into ... something more ... Artsy .

And it'll be a l o t bigger if some of the things are NOT in here so i guess we should say BYE BYE to those things ...

- - -

WTF moment . ha ha . I look ugly in all the pictures anyway so i don't mind so much putting it up .

OH and excuse the messy room . It's KIRA'S ROOM <--- must highlight this .

so ... 3 more days to results !

Honestly , i feel lost .

I don't know where my main AIM is anymore . I really , really feel lost .

You know what ? If i can't get into an Art school , i'll just go to whichever poly that'll accept me .

Even if it's a random course . I should try new things anyway . Yeah it'll kinda suck but i'll learn to accept it .

I have a bad feeling about the results , sigh .

i see all the sec threes tweeting about scoring 11 points or below .

Sorry to say but IT'S NOT EASY . i mean , seriously .

Unless you're naturally born smart like all the 4E4 students from my batch .

i used to think i could do it too when i was in sec three but oh hell no .

im hoping for 5 passes .

I've visited Laselle's web page [ for the 100th time ] and the interview sounds kinda nerve-wrecking .

But if i don't try i'll never know right ? i'll have to bring a port folio - A2 paper with atleast ten drawings / whatever . I'll need 2D and 3D artworks too for more varieties . I'm in trouble cux ... i don't do 3D stuffs .

i mean , i think i lost em all . So if i do get to go to the interview , it'll be purely based on my luck and my talking skills ...

NAFA sounds easier to get in ... just sit for an observation drawing test and an english proficiency test [ unless you already got a credit for English O levels ] .

YES I DID MY RESEARCH .

but i can't do any of the things listed above if i don't pass 5 subjects including English .

*touch wood* if i don't really do well ... i'll gather the points and just apply to the JAE system and just hope for the best . I'll apply to all random 12 courses that'll accept my points .

YES I DID RESEARCH ON THAT TOO .

and and and if i don't get into anything ...

i'll work ... get cash ... apply for private O's ... maybe i'll sit for a paper or two .

it might be costly but i have to do it .

And it's a longer route but ... It's the same as going to sec five and then going to a poly anyway so im not really gonna be far behind EXCEPT that i'll have to study on my own which is gonna be a lil weird ...

Oh please let me get good results , God !

<3 Rainn

maybe that's why i fell into you .

2012-01-04T17:31:00.000-08:00

Hey Guys !

Page 5 of 366 already !

this thing trends everyday on Twitter . Ha ha . It basically means , 5th day of 2012 . I think they're trending it everyday to see whether the world will really end -.-" That's silly cux i know it's not gonna end but contributing to the trend is kinda cute AND we get to see people complaining that they're still on page 4 or a page earlier cause of the different time zones . ha ha .

It's Kirq's birthday today so Happy Birthday to him ! : D

5 more days to my birthday and 4 more days to O level results . <--- fast huh ?

yes , i'm scared but at the same time , i just want it to end . I just want to get my results and quickly get over it . I don't know how i'll do we'll just have to wait and see and let's hope for the Best .

i like my hair colour in pictures . Looks really good ... even though it's uneven .

But i'm still thinkin of adding the hot pink . I think i'm going crazy . :p What's new ?

2E2'09 Class BBQ this Saturday ! :) I'm excited for it cause i like barbecued food unless it's NOT marinated well . . . And i can't wait to meet my friends ! So many catching ups to do .

so i've been trying to do covers but i keep failing ! I don't know how many times i took the video yesterday but i kept screwing up so i gave up . Plus a lot of em kept interrupting me -____-

Think it has something to do with the confidence issue AGAIN cux whenever i record it , i'll screw a word or two up OR i'll just forget the freakin lyrics OR i'll lose focus in the strumming of the guitar OR i'll just go blank .

Story of my life .

it's 2012 already and i'm still having confidence issues . Why oh Why .

so ...

Thinking about the results is killin me . I pray for everyone EVERY NIGHT !

i really do . I wanna step in the hall and i want to hear the teachers saying :" this year , we have 100% passes ! " That would be so awesome ... but i doubt that's possible . i mean , a 90 plus percent is possible but 100% is a lil bull cux i know people who didn't even study ... or bothered to turn up for the papers ...

I still can't believe it's 4 days away ! The long wait is finally coming to an end ! Time flies too fast cux i feel as if o level ended last week . : /

And the holidays are coming to an end . OH NO .

But look on the brighter side , we're getting back the heat !

i'm talking about the weather ! I'm really loving the heat .

No , not when the days are scorching hot and im dying - that's different .

AND i only love the heat when it's daytime . At night , i'd expect it to be cold enough for sleep .

speaking of sleep . . .

i've been awake since yesterday . I dozed off for a while but it's not long enough .

can't believe i'm on the computer at this hour . It's only 9am !

I don't know why i can't sleep . I JUST CAN'T .

and i don't even feel tired during the day .

i'll just feel ... well , lazy .

Have you guys heard Unfriend You by Greyson Chance ? I really like the song .

Yeah he kinda sounds like a girl in the song and if you didn't know it was him , you'd think it was a girl singing but it's a fab song , really . Don't know why the song has SO MANY HATERS !

i mean , it's pretty pointless to be commenting hate comments on a Youtube video you're not even interested don't you think ? GO BURY YOURSELVES . If you hate the song , why in the world did you even bother to look it up AND waste your bloody seconds commenting on it ?

-..-

i can never understand .

Damn im hungry . Think im gonna get a bite .

Stay tuned always <3

<3 RAINN

Everytime .

2012-01-02T02:45:00.000-08:00

in love with her hair . SERIOUSLY !!!

i think i wanna go blonde . Platinum blonde .

HA HA .

tsk i wouldn't mind if i'm FAIR but i'm not so platinum will look a lil ... off on me , i guess .

but i think i wanna try the pink tips like the one in the picture :D

Pink Is In .

Right now , my hair's ... brown . lol . A boring shade of brown .

It's supposed to be Auburn but the colour faded and i rebleached some parts so now it's ...

well , bleach colour .

Yes , i gotta get it fixed . Soon !

Oh i'll need a black hairspray for results day . Why won't they allow us to go in with our hair coloured ?

Some schools allow . Jeez . Tell me why i hate school again ?

i am in love with Boyce Avenue all over again . :')

And him wearing the Elmo shirt is genius . *melts*

if you have a Youtube account , SUBSCRIBE TO THEM !

" Every teardrop is a waterfall ... "

so ANYWAY ...

this was before i rebleached / cut my hair . [ YES ITS UNEVEN . LOLS ]

Now it looks _________ . Just plain Horrible cux Kira CUT IT . ha ha .

Well , i screwed her fringe so i guess it's fair . I don't understand why she hates her fringe so much !

it's super nice ! i just made it shorter cux she wanted it to be shorter but she's not happy with it now .

Jeez . Whatever . She layered my hair but it looks like a HOT MESS . The upper part's all ...

short-ish with not much layers , just messed up hair . lol .

It's kinda funny , come to think of it .

It's okay , it'll grow . It's kinda shorter and so much thinner now but it'll grow eventually .

But i loved my thick hair :'(

- - -

A friend of mine got in a car accident during New Years' Eve . Thank God they're fine !

She had to do multiple shots and stitches on her head but thank God she's fine . My prayer goes out to your family :)

- - -

okay this is SO RANDOM ! HA HA .

i like Tigers ! They are so adorable ! until they kill ya ...

but seriously , they are giant Cats . and i like CATS A LOT <3

- - -

My birthday's coming in 8 more days ! :) Gonna combine it with Moosey cux his birthday is on the 28 of Jan .

yes , it's kinda far apart but it's okay y'know ? Who's gonna care ? ha ha .

We're gonna make a BBQ pit . I hope it won't go C R A Z Y with people SEPARATED cux that would really suck . I don't want people to have their own small groups . I like the feel of being in a family - if you know what i mean . It's like , i don't care if i don't know you , since we are here , we'll make friends and we'll hang out together [ that kinda thing ]

it wasn't my idea to have a BBQ pit actually but i don't mind ! :D Who doesn't like food ?

i like celebrating it old style , with a birthday cake and lotsa people that i'm comfortable with .

i repeat ...

WHO DOESN'T LIKE FOOD ?

I am SO asking Dad to marinate the chickens cause his chickens ARE THE BEST OF THE BEST .

I've been to a l o t of barbecues and i can say this confidently : Dad's marinated chickens are the best .

i hope we get a place that's not DARK ...

The other time Bam booked a place for her pit and it was ... TOO DARK ... and i'm not cool with dark places . I'll go crazy . <--- seriously speaking .

Bash ? Better not get me into this . Bash anything you want , just don't bash ME , MY CAMERA , MY CLOTHES , MY FOOD . Just bash Moosey , that'll be great .

anyway , forget about that for a while ...

results' gonna come in 7 days time .

it's either gonna be the 9th , 10th or 11th .

PLEASE , NOT ON MY BIRTHDAY .

:'(

i hope i do well .

i'll still keep praying for everyone's success .

<3 Rainn

Happy 2012 !

2012-01-01T06:39:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year Guys ! :)

1st January already ! I didn't go to any countdown cux i was busy shoppin with my family :)

[ minus Kira ]

It was really fun . Finally bought a new flat iron .

My hair is super thin and weird now . And i think it's shorter .

Shouldn't have let Kira touched my hair . Regret x one billion .

but it'll grow eventually ... so whatever ...

today ?

well , went to Tamp with the usuals cux Bam wants to find a black top for her work .

Ate , walked , shopped , the usual ...

and then went back to White Sands to meet up with the rest .

We played Donkey ! HA HA .

Talk about Old School ! i miss the game so so much !

But i gotta tell ya something , i used to CRY WHEN I BECAME THE DONKEY : 0

and i was the first one to be the donkey just now <--- embarrassing .

BUT i didn't cry so that's a first .

I would have cried harder if it was Old Maid !

By the time our generation's gone , no one would remember the old card games like Old Maid , Donkey , Happy family anymore :'(

Those were the days .

i'll be back here ! I'm watching this malay show on Suria !

Everyone's talking about it so let's go !

<3 Rainn

formspring.me

2011-12-30T01:56:00.001-08:00

Ask me anything http://www.formspring.me/RainnIng10

And when the rain comes .

2011-12-29T07:47:00.000-08:00

i miss studying . ha ha .

I've been at home for the past two days already ! I'm still sick apparently .

oh wait , i think i've been here for three days . Time flies ..

I slept early yesterday , which is kinda surprising cause i'm a LATE sleeper but i guess the cough syrup works . Definitely made me sleep but i'm still coughing like a mad dog . [ not that a mad dog , coughs , anyway ... ]

so i woke up at 10 plus [ am ] ... and i didn't really know what to do ...

I lazed around while Dad cooked . The food looks great BUT i couldn't taste anything :(

I pretended that i could taste so that i would eat .

I <3 food .

After a while , i got really , really bored so i decided to paint again . The first painting was kinda horrible so i kinda ... messed it up . ha ha . Mom was kinda annoyed cause she liked it . She likes ANYTHING :/ She hung my worst-ever-painting on our wall and i can't do anything about it ! GRR .

But seriously , it's just horrible .

I did another painting . I painted Zayn Malik but it's a lil cartoon-ish . I'm a first-timer when it comes to painting human features . Never tried it ! But i guess i'm fine with the second try cause it looks so much better . Ferr says it looks like Zayn but Kira says it looks like someone handsome but prolly not Zayn .

ha ha . There's something wrong with his chin though ... And his lips .

i'm talking about the painting NOT Zayn Malik <--- he's perfect and nothing will go wrong on him .

After many hours [ i think i took 2-3 hours ] , i decided to relax and rest . I'll continue tomorrow if i'm well enough . It's definitely hard . To paint with a runny nose :p Hate being sick . Grandpa cares though :')

I can't stop staring at my painting . I am not satisfied with the chin and the lips .

AND the eyes are slightly bigger . : / i will never be satisfied till i get it right . I don't care how it looks like from other people's point of view . If i don't think it's right , i really don't think it's right ...

Life of a perfectionist . It gets tiring , really .

i want to be perfect in terms of my projects / works etc .

Would totally like a perfect figure and out look but let's face it , i'm nowhere near there so i aim to be Perfect in terms of everything else apart from looks so ... deal with it .

maybe when i'm older , i'll get things to enhance my looks or whatever but right now , since i can't do anything about it , might as well focus on things that matter .

Yes , it sucks AND i have a deep fear of being judged so imagine being Me for a day .

I wouldn't mind staying at home for a year because of this fear but everyday , i tell myself , that i can face the world and i will .

Yeah i'm going out and i'm facing people but i still try to hide myself . I still try to just go to places that are filled with silence and darkness .

i enjoy being around the people i'm comfortable with but other than that , i'll get scared , of being judged .

People say " Fuck what others say , i am me and i'm comfortable in my own skin " .

I can't bring myself to say it out loud cause i know i'll be lying to myself .

May 2012 be a great year for me to improve my self esteem / confidence .

My aim is to finally love myself and just , live life to the fullest and do what i want to do .

i know God is with me , always . I would also like to constantly thank God , everyday , every second of my life on everything ! Hopefully i'll live life just as He instructed us to and nothing else .

2012 will be Great , i'll see to it . :D

- - -

i am jealous of these beautiful Malaysian actresses !

Like , Nora Danish , Maya Karin , Lisa Surihani [?] and many more !

Fazura too ! OH MY GOSH , they are the true definition of Gorgeous .

I would DIE to have their looks .

seriously .

URGH .

<3 Rainn

Gonna watch Breakout now <--- love love love this show .

airs on Channel 8 , weekdays , 12am .

It's a repeated show but i missed a lot of episodes and ... watching it won't kill so ...

he he .

i tell em easy come

2011-12-28T04:13:00.000-08:00

I AM SICK

: /

Runny Nose / Sore Throat / Major Coughs / Headache , you name it , i have it .

Didn't get to meet my friends :( i've been caught up in my own world .

But no worries , we have like , all the time in the world to meet up . With effort , anything is possible .

I'm looking forward to a new year BUT at the same time , i'm not ready for it .

2011's been crappy !

i started painting yesterday . It was definitely difficult . I had to re-do the nose lotsa times and im still not satisfied with it . But every success comes with a failure so i have to keep on going .

The thing about me is that , i tend to give up easily . If i think i suck at it , i won't dwell on it anymore and i'll just leave it hangin .

But i gotta do it . Time to prove myself wrong .

Didn't paint today cause i'm too sick to do anything -___- . I woke up at 4pm , ate , tweeted , chatted with Ain for a while and then now i'm back on the comp . Sometimes i prefer staying in at all times cux i'm too ugly to face the world . <--- this mindset never changes .

So ... new year's coming in 3 days time .

Are you guys up for it ?

Guess i won't celebrate it cux i have to follow Ferr get her stationaries on the 31st with Dad .

How sad is that ?! Kirq's gonna have a countdown bbq and i think i'll only get to join em afterwards [ late for sure ]

Results day ? I have no idea when is it exactly . It's either on the 9th or 10th .

LET IT BE ON THE 9th please !

Don't want to turn 17 on a serious day : /

i can't believe im gonna be 17 in less than two weeks . AND i can't believe results' day is coming .

I don't want the holidays to end . I just want to stay at home forever and do nothing .

ha ha . I really , really need all the time in the world to rest .

I've never been THIS free <--- i don't know how many times i'm repeating this but it's true .

So ... my cousins' been great ! We hang out almost ALL THE TIME with the outside friends .

Their friends are my friends too so we're all one big family .

i miss Kitty & AJ ! <--- Greatest Friends .

my holiday's been great , i guess ! I get to relax , i get to finally breathe in as much air as i want ! I get to go shopping ! I get to save money ! i get to paint ! i get to go to a runway show ! I get to do photoshoots with The Best ! I get to meet new people !

i will never forget my close friends obviously . Just cux i've been busy , doesnt mean i won't meet em !

These ladies above = i am so meeting u guys soon whether u like or not lol

AJ ! <3 <3 <3 You're busy with Work right , Hangten girl ! But idc !

RUPING TOO !

This Gorgeous girl too ! KITTY !

and also Asyiqin ! <3 [ okay we all look horrible in this pic lols ]

KIKA !!!

my twin ! <3 Raudhy !

and ofcourse Beautiful Dinah ! <3 [ oh i look super fair here omg no edits ]

i'll find ways to meet these beautiful people <3

Yeah im friends with almost everybody but these are the people who are constantly there for me when i need em :) Whatever happens , they'll still be in my heart !

Nowhere else :)

And ofcourse Chun Kwan & XinOR ! My ex work mates . It's impossible to forget them , seriously .

Speakin of Workmates , Siti's working at Mcd , White sands now ! I saw her :)

it's better to leave kfc though cux the pay's just too low but the family bond is very strong .

*sigh* i wonder how's Maam Ging ! <3 Miss her maximum !

Best Manager ever .

Next year will be a BETTER YEAR regardless of my results .

it'll be better for everyone . I'll pray for it !

<3 Rainn

Oh God .

2011-12-27T02:00:00.000-08:00

This is not cool .

I saw some tweets about Taylor Laurtner being GAY and i googled it and it's true .

He admitted .

THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ALL THE HOT PEOPLE ?!

and i heard that Zayn Malik is also gay ?!

i googled that one but some said no , while some said yes , so i'm not sure .

God , what is up with everyone , turning lesbians and gays ?

it's not normal .

Damn . Looks like i gotta find a new wallpaper for my phone AND a new picture in my wallet .

Grr .

Just stop turning gay / lesbian please , hot people .

<3 Rainn

GrandeurFai's Fashion show .

2011-12-26T06:36:00.000-08:00

so i did went to the Fashion Show / Runway way .

It was very , very cool !

The dresses were amazing and most of them are covered with Swarvoski's blings ! [ i have no idea how you spell it ]

It was just amazing BUT i as super self-conscious . : /

WE SAT DIRECTLY INFRONT of the stinkin runway and there were lotsa people !

But sitting infront was a privilege cux i get to see the dresses upfront and i swear to God , i almost died in my seat because of the gorgeous dresses ! And the models did an amazing job !

Two of them almost tripped and it was kinda funny but hey , their heels were super tall and i can never walk in em so kudos to them !

I did take pictures ! But it was kinda dark so i had to change the settings . And the camera SUCKS . =.=

The team's camera woman was beside me so it was kinda awkward cux i'm not professional and shits .

ha ha . but i took pictures anyway !

The dresses and the models looked AMAZING real life .

walking dolls ! I SWEAR .

But i really , really enjoyed myself . The Designer himself , is very humble and funny !

I am SO GETTING MY DRESS from him if i'm getting married .

smoke !

this is Mr Fai , the Designer , oh and he designed the clothes he wore !

Mom took the first five pictures with her digi camera cux i missed the intro .. lol . oops . AND i remember the girl [ host ] !

She's an actress from Suria . Wow , she's all grown up now ...

her face reads model all over .

*drools*

pictures below are the ones i took . Excuse the poor shots . i was EMBARRASSED .

So many handsome photographers on our right and the lighting crew . Gosh . So if i were to stand up and take a picture , i would feel really , really weird .

TSK .

i am sucha square .

why is my confidence / self-esteem so low ?

oh and the pictures are not in order .

i didn't take ALL The dresses obviously cux there were 80 of em !

but there's only 15 [?] models .

i really like this dress .

very xmas feel right ? :D

there are clothes for the plus sized ones too !

damn this picture is kinda unclear . She looks like Rossa !

she looks ... like ... a stinkin ... doll AND I LOVE THIS DRESS

love this one too

and this one !

This is so Barbie Doll-ish ! but the picture sucks . oops

argh im dying . i want all his dresses !

gorgeous blue .

finale .

i think this is Mom's model ! She is effing Gorgeous maximum !

the make up artistes were invited to the runway ! Aww , and Mom's friend was happily waving at us .

zomg , beautiful dress !

See , i told you the pictures are not in order . : /

my bad .

AND i love , love , love the Designer already .

Friendly , Funny and Humble !

AND he won a lot of regional rewards for his dresses AND also his models .

GAH .

this is my first time going to a runway show and i really , really enjoyed myself .

It's not only that ! They had waiters walking around serving us food and drinks !

And after the show , they had a buffet !

Talk about Class .

The camera crew and whatever crew were so supportive and fun !

They took pictures afterwards and they did like , a cheer or something .

They're all family .

I wish i was as successful as him ! :D

Mom had a lot of fun , obviously cause this is obviously Her Thing .

I don't even know how she got invited .

She has a lot of friends . . .

I didn't take some of the pretty dresses i saw cux the camera just decided to die on me .

= . =

but it's okay , i got to see it for myself and i liked it a lot ! :D

<3 Rainn

yes i know , the pictures are horribly taken . HA HA .

Oh well . . .

Mood-less ?

2011-12-24T08:19:00.000-08:00

picture taken at nick's house . Picture quality suck , yes , i get it .

TODAY .

well , today is Xmas Eve ! Sales everywhere and i'm sure the whole island is crowded with last minute shoppers . Merry Xmas to everyone !

Nick , Ferr , Ruls & I went to Bras Basah to get my canvas & painting items ! ^^

i am so happy that the canvasses were cheap because of the Xmas sales . I bought two .

They're kinda small but well , i should start small anyway .

Thanks for accompanying me guys ! <3

oh and i <3 Art Friend . I felt like getting almost EVERYTHING there , not kidding .

Didn't get myself those expensive acrylics though cux i don't wanna waste Dad's money ...

It's okay , i'm saving up anyway , I'll get myself whatever i need when i can !

[ look on the brighter side ]

So afterwards , we ate our lunch and i didn't really eat cause i wasn't hungry .

I just find it a n n o y i n g that i have to chew and chew and chew .

IT GETS TIRING ...

so all i had was some curly wurly fries ! It wasn't even upsized and i couldn't finish . what is happening to my appetite 0.0

We saw a black dude and he is so h o t . I mean , seriously . He looks like those American Black singers ! Gosh ! And he had a cap on and he looked so cool and calm .

Damn .

Afterwards , Ferr & Ruls went back to Bam's place at Simei while Nick and i went to Tampines .

Ferr's sleeping over there so that means ... I HAVE THE BED ALL TO MYSELF TONIGHT !

I am really , really tired right now cux we walked a lot . But i'm thankful for the weather !

Atleast it's not scorching . I love the cool weather . It's not too cold , or too hot , just perfect .

i should have brought my camera along cux atleast i'd have pictures to put here !

But i didn't : / It's okay , i'll bring it next time .

Anyway , i'm gonna start my project soon . What project ? My painting project !

okay , what the heck am i talking about . ha ha . It's nothing special . I just wanna paint .

If i could paint everyday , i would . I'm gonna attempt painting human beings - features , to be exact .

I know i'm not the world's greatest painter ever lived and ten year olds would prolly paint better than me but if i like painting , i should just do it . I enjoy Art and i'm not seeking anything from it .

- - -

I totally forgot about the runway show tomorrow ! Mom says i can go with her . She got invited exclusively , damn , how lucky can she get ?!

I really , really , really wanted to go atfirst but ... i don't think i want to now .

I just don't wanna turn up and embarrass her infront of everyone . I mean , she's kinda " known " and ...

she does make up and all ... i just don't wanna turn up looking like an idiot .

I'm sure they'd expect someone who's flawless with the perfect make up and perfect being but i'm not .

So , i guess i'll just give it a pass .

Stupid but i don't want to risk it .

- - -

please let me be perfect .

- - -

i am so mood-less today . I traveled home in silence . I mean , it's not like i talk to myself [ okay , i do ] but this time , i just sat in the bus and talk to God .

I talk to Him almost of the time so it's not really suprising ...

But i feel like , i'm worried for my future .

i'm always worried for my future and what's gonna happen and shits but today , the worry level increased .

Just give me the fucking O level results . Just give me the results . Sad or happy , atleast i have time to recover from it if i get it now .

i can't wait for a new year . New beginning , new everything !

Results , be it , good or bad , life goes on . i'll cry from it if it's bad yeah blablabla but i'll have to move on eventually but if it's a happy thing , i'll still cry .

ha ha

random note : i love Adele's eye colour .

i told you it was random . tsk .

- - -

So how do i tell Mom that i'm not going ? hmm ...

<3 Rainn

S h o p p i n

2011-12-22T07:42:00.000-08:00

Ello ! So today we went Shopping ! It wasn't really intense cause Bam & Nick has to go off early for jammin but it was fun ! i spent 80 bux . : / so much for " im gonna save "

But it's okay , i bought a mini piggy bank to save up the rest !

HA HA .

We went to Somerset and then walked and walked and walked so it was all over the place .

Wanted to get clothes from H&M but the queue was ridiculous so we just left . Ha ha . It's okay , there were other shops to go anyway .

I saw Cheryl & James [ if i'm not wrong ] ! Okay , so Cheryl saw me first ha ha . I think they're working or something . So cute !

So we walked and walked . Nick spent A L O T of time searching for his school bag and shoes .

: / Note to everyone : DONT EVER GO SHOPPING WITH NICK .

edited the lighting for this pic fyi

And i really , really , really wanted to get something from New look ...

but i ended up getting clothe sfrom F21 ! :D

i saw this green coat and it was sooooooooooooo delicious looking that i had to get it and so i did .

HA HA . i swear , i love it !

Im not really sure where i would wear it but i don't care , i don't mind looking at it in my closet !

taken from the itouch SUPER BAD QUALITY : /

but i love the green ! it looks better real life so ... wait till i wear it :D

Forever 21 <3

but i'm only 16 so forever 16 . :D

We roamed about and ended up at Cotton on . I bought a black skirt cux it looks good . ha ha .

what is wrong with me ?! when i see something nice , i'll just get it .

Ferr says my money's crying right now cux i spent it .

TSK LOOK WHOSE TALKING .

HAVE YOU SEEN HER SHOE COLLECTIONS ?!

Bam & Ferr has a weird obsession with collecting shoes ... but not wearing em .

i have no idea why but okay ... i 'respect' the obsession cux i have weird obsessions too ... but im not gonna say it here he he .

so we bought a few more things , ate at KFC ! <--- yes KFC .

and then went to Simei ! Ferr and i went to Daiso cause i like Daiso !

You can get anything for TWO DOLLARS . Talk about CHEAP .

So i got myself the mini piggy bank .

he he . It's really cute , not kidding .

So we separated [ Bam & Nick went to the jamming studio and Ferr & i went home ]

while we were walking towards the MRT station , MY LEGS DID THIS REALLY WEIRD MOVEMENT AND I ALMOST FELL INFRONT OF EVERYONE .

yes , it was humiliating .

i mean , i really don't know what happened there and gosh i felt so stupid so i quickly walked towards the mrt station and never looked back . : /

i felt so stupid , i wanted to cry .

sucha square .

- - -

Short day today . Hopefully we'll go shopping again . I don't care i'm getting more clothes .

New year means new clothes right ?

he he .

I need a new bag and new shoes too .

I think i'll most probably find em next week .

ALSO ALSO , while we were shopping , a tall and HANDSOME dude blocked my way but he was sooooooooo handsome and did i mention , tall ?

i think he's a China dude or something but seriously , he's the HOT one .

And i was like "WOAHHH ..." and he smiled .

DAMN .

Why is everyone so attractive nowadays ?

Jeez . It hurts .

when will it be my turn ? tomorrow ? OKAY CAN .

<3 Rainn

Who wants to go shopping with me ?!

She expected the world

2011-12-20T07:55:00.000-08:00

yes , stupid picture

Hello world !

went out with Nick to Tamp to get my lenses and i bought the wrong one .

So i paid $33 for one pair of lens . : /

So i kinda down for a short period of time cause i felt SO stupid for buying it but i got over it :D

and the colour's kinda cool so yeah ...

[ 3 tone honey colour fyi ]

so we walked around and i bumped into Dinah & Raudhy <3

Dinah found a job at Tamp one ! So happy for her . ha ha . Raudhy has a job too .

Am i like , the only one who's not working here ?!

i'm still enjoying my free time so shoo .

After much walkin , we went back to White Sands to meet Bam and the rest . They went roller blading !

How fun . I would totally roller blade but WITH NO ONE AROUND cause i'll look darn stupid when i fall .

YES , IM AFRAID OF LOOKING STUPID INFRONT OF A CROWD .

i am afraid of everything <--- i am getting sick and tired of being around myself JEEZ .

So anyway , Fae's sister is so adorable , i swear ! I feel like pinching her cheeks every time i look at her !

TOO CUTE . grr !

So the usuals were there . Fae , Nina , Afa , Bam , Nick , Mo [ went off earlier ] , Kira , Sun fiq ...

we're going out again this week [ i hope ! ] . To town maybe , need to go shopping badly . :(

Nick needs to get his school things and i need to get new EVERYTHING ...

But i won't spend much cause i have to save ...

I don't know what i'm saving for but i just wanna try saving cux i suck badly at it .

I am very worried for my future . I just want everything to be perfect so maybe my savings = emergency needs .

maybe .

so anyway , Dad finally bought us a new iphone / itouch charger ! im no longer using my iphone but the itouch is a NEED ! i use EVERY NIGHT cause i can't sleep and i just have to tweet . Bad addiction but who cares .

Singapore's becoming SO expensive . We have to use so much money on the stinkin public transport !

i mean SERIOUSLY .

The cab fare increased , the bus fare increased , the train fare increased !

Even the food at the Night Market are not as cheap as before ! :(

what is happening ?!

All the more reasons for my parents to increase my allowance :D ha ha .

like that's gonna ever happen . -_______-

I'll only start work next year cux i feel like it .

Yeah it's gonna be a struggle with school and all but i've been there once and i survived .

okay , i don't want to talk about school . Wait till my result comes .

i am toooooooooooooo scared for my life .

i just want to do well . please God , let me pass . PLEASE !

okay enough talk about the results .

so anyway , when & where can i get my confidence back ?

*shakes head*

until when ?!

UNTIL WHEN ?!

i need professional help , i'm not kidding about this part . I've been saying this a lot but people take this as a joke . i am NOT JOKING !

I guess i'll save up real hard and i'll go fix myself up .

i'll go see a psychiatrist . <--- did i spell that right ?

Somebody hear me out please .

i guess i'll go now . I won't ever stop blogging even if there are no readers .

Someday i'll make all these posts into a book and i'll get to read it when i'm old !

<3 Rainn

resultsss

2011-12-19T02:38:00.000-08:00

Congratulations to all the sec 4Ns who made it to sec five !

i am SO happy for them !

Instead of the usual 2 classes of sec fives , there'll be 3 NEXT YEAR !

my prayers are heard !

I wish them all the best for their O's next year .

And to those who didn't make it , it's not the end !

Soon it's gonna be my turn .

all the best to the o level takers ! <3

<3 Rainn

Colours .

2011-12-17T07:35:00.000-08:00

my lower arm looks roasted . HA HA HA

Had to go out with specs today cause my lenses are expired .

: /

Today is another hang - out day with Bam and the others . Went to the swamp area but the lighting was so bad so we only got a few nice pictures . BOO .

it's blurry ! :( : ( : (

So today's random photoshoot was a bit of a failure but who cares . ha ha .

We were just having fun .

Saw Nooris and his big gang at DTE ! Well , he saw me - to be exact .

I couldn't really see well cause my specs were off but he came near and soon i saw him .

HA HA . It was kinda funny .

So afterwards we went to White Sands back . Moosey & Kira joined us afterwards and i think Lulu came .

Ferr & i went home earlier cause Mom brought home lotsa food from her model's birthday .

OH YES . Mom got invited to a private runway fashion show . * Jealous *

Mom is living The Life while i'm here doing nothing .

I'm not "depressed " anymore but i do have "my days" . I'll still sit and stare into blank space .

I'll still think .

i've been good right ? I've been blogging ! HE HE . See , i told you i'll never stop blogging even if i'm OLD .

i'll be a super modernized grandma !

I'll live to be a 100 ! <--- okay we'll see about that . After all , 2012 is coming and i heard it's gonna be the end of the world .

okay , i don't believe in that so ... yeah .

Mom brought home lotsa spaghetti , cakes & cream puffs !

i think i ate too much sweet-tasting goods ...

i have an awful headache now ...

I don't know what's the link between eating to much sweets & headaches but ...

i really think i ate too much .

oh look ! somebody on twitter said this .

" HA HA and HAHA has two different meanings "

WELL DUH ?! ONE HAS A SPACE IN BETWEEN . LMFAO .

okay obviously he or she meant something else but omg are you s t u p i d .

my HA HA[s] has been like that SINCE FOREVER and it totally has the same meaning as

"HAHAHAHA" .

God . Why do people tweet these things ? It's getting on my nerves .

I'm not even following that person . Somebody on my followers' list , retweeted that tweet .

but seriously .

HA HA & HAHA = SAME .

unless you're blind .

- - -

headache's getting worse ! This ain't right ...

- - -

still can't find the guitar bag . I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHERE THE HELL IT WENT TO : /

N level results on Monday and i'm the one getting nervous .

Mine's not until next year but still ...

Goodluck to everyone for their results ! May you guys go to sec five together !

i guess i better go now . Follow me on Twitter !

Rainn_Ing .

i'll just follow back so you don't have to worry and all .

>3 Rainn

Pink fingernails .

2011-12-16T07:59:00.000-08:00

i like this camera effect . What is it called again ? danggit , i forgot .

" When she was just a girl , she expected the world . But it flew away from her reach , so she ran away in her sleep " - Paradise , Coldplay .

How can anyone hate Coldplay ? They are The Best of The Best .

Anyway , i am going to make a cover of Skyscraper soon . A tough song but i wanna try it out .

And soon , i'll make a cover of either Paradise or Every Teardrop is a Waterfall by Coldplay <3

I am not a good guitar player but it's okay , i'm getting there . I'm too used to having long fingernails and i don't wanna cut em ultra short ... It'll feel totally weird and EMPTY don't ya think ?

i really miss having a keyboard . I am so getting my hands on a new one . Gotta start saving up - again .

So yeah , met up with Nick , Ferr , Bam , Nina , Fae , Isra , Mr Aries AND i finally got to meet MO !

i mean , i've heard them talkin about Mo and i've never seen him live until now .

He's nice !

The group's getting bigger and bigger .

Not that there's any particular person that's supposed to be in the group anyway <--- am i makin sense here ? lol .

I was supposed to bring the guitar but OH MY GOSH , i GIVE UP searching for the goddamned guitar bag ! Ferr & i searched the whole house and we gave up after a long search .

It was bloody tiring . I really don't know where it went to ! I had it a few days ago !

come out , come out , wherever you are , guitar bag .

Thought of going to Bam's place tomorrow to jam but i forgot that it's a Saturday ... and her Mom's gonna be at home ... and it'll be rather awkward ... so i'd rather not .

*picture above* i almost slipped and fall while climbing the rocks . It is s c a r y but worth it cause i like the picture .

so i edited the lighting to these pictures .

Bam is a great photographer - no doubt about this one .

i don't know what happened to my photography skills ha ha . But it's okay , there's still time to improve .

Who says the ugly ones can't take a good picture ?!

you're so wrong about that .

Sunday outing POSTPONED cause there's gonna be a wedding celebration or something .

i don't know whose getting married but ... it's a totally MUST GO thing .

So yeah . But it's okay , we plan to go out on the 20+ December <--- few days before Xmas ?

Or maybe on the Xmas day itself ha ha .

i don't mind ... who stays home on Xmas , you tell me !

So how's my life been so far ?

It's been great ! I'm really enjoying my free time with the awesome peeps !

I am kinda stress free .

I am still worried about the results but that can totally wait .

<3 Rainn

Out with love

2011-12-15T08:07:00.000-08:00

Today = fun fun fun

BUT at the same time , tiring .

I had a really bad tummy cramp and it was so ... o difficult to walk but i managed .

We managed ^^

pictures are all uneditted . We explored the camera's effects . They were good actually ! And we figured out what the hell is wrong with the camera ! We even asked various shops for help and they couldn't help us .

Tsk , call yourselves a CAMERA EXPERT . I will totally fire you guys if i'm your boss . Useless .

Bam figured out the problem , to be fair . So YAY HER !

ha ha . the point of this picture is ... ? *looks up*

Nick , Bam , Ferr and i went to PRP to chill and have lunch there :)

i love going to parks . I feel relaxed and calm there . I feel like , i'm a part of nature .

he he .

We are self - proclaimed Tumblr models . LOL .

Bam and i are thinkin of makin a combined Tumblr account where we can post pictures that we took .

NICE ones obviously .

Afterwards , we met up with Sun Fiq , Afa and Kira at Mcdonald - the usual .

Wanted to bring the guitar but ... nah . It'll be a lil too troublesome cause i have my cramps ...

and i'll feel like dying ... and ... the day won't be awesome ...

So anyway , i think we're going out again on Sunday ! To Arab Street or Town or whatever .

Shopping Time ! ^^ And ofcourse more pictures .

OH and the A&F store is open ! Wow , can i see what's it like there please ...

And i totally missed the chance to take pictures with the hot + half naked models there : (

It's okay , it's okay .

ANYWAY , i also missed Liam on the radio ! :( And i heard that One Direction is coming to visit Singapore next year ! WOW ! Will i finally meet Zayn Malik ? <--- lol , i make it sound like he's a long lost friend or something . I doubt i'll get to see ANY of em because of Singaporeans . People here are CRAZY .

Crazy Fans All Over . It's SCARY .

so yeah , X FACTOR IS ON AIR NOW . lol !

second telecast though cause i always missed the first one boo .

Simon is HOT

.ha ha .

and and and , CHRIS RENE FOR THE WIN !

I <3 CHRIS RENE

Melanie looks like Mariah Carey <--- seriously ...

Marcus is handsome !

And Josh ... is Josh .

Josh is great , seriously but ... he reminds me of Shrek ...

- - -

Can't wait to go out with them again !

And also with my friends ! Soon Soon .

Gonna meet up with Ain and Idayo , the week after next

Different timings though cause both of em are busy with work <--- BOO STOP WORKIN !

ha ha , kidding !

Words of wisdom from my Role Model [ Mahirah ] " Enjoy first before results "

SO HELL YEAH I AM ENJOYING MYSELF .

i've been worried about my results 24/7 . Tsk .

What is wrong with me .

i cleared the air just now .

i was like ...

" i think im gonna fail o levels "

and it felt so much better after saying it out loud . YES i am dumb . boo me .

i used to be smart but that was during the PSLE period . lmao .

now i'm just a plain idiot who can't even go through graduation .

So yes , i'm gonna have a BAD birthday and i'm gonna cry my lungs out and then ...

i'll be so lost and i'll shut myself and i'll be depressed but i'll get over it . Why ?

cause i'm used to having set backs .

When will i ever succeed ?

Of course i want to pass but my gut feeling is SO strong and i don't know what to think .

But i will still continue praying hard and i will still pray for everyone's else results too !

There is still hope y'know

i just got to have more faith in God and also myself . Whatever happens , God is with me always and i know , He is gonna make things better . :')

Even though my gut feelin is very strong , there's still hope . I mean , after all , i've been wrong .

During primary school , i thought i did badly for my malay exam [ this was when i was in primary 5 or 6 but not psle ] . I felt so scared and i cried in the toilet for SO LONG but ONLY GOD KNOWS ABOUT IT ...

i felt like i was gonna die ! I really , really thought i did badly so i went home , i prayed hard that i'll get atleast a pass ...

a week after that , our results came out ...

i scored the highest in class .

and i was like " HUH ?! HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE ?!!!!! "

but seriously , i am not kidding about that one . You should have seen my face when my teacher announced it . Until then , i've never doubt myself ... but now's the time to start doubting again .

Cause i lost all the confidence in the world and i lost every single thing there is to have in a person .

i don't even know myself now <--- mega boo .

i don't know what to think ...

Maths / Science / Humans = D7 .

Mt = B3

Art = C6

English = C6

L1R4 = ... 29

okay , if i would fail , i would want to fail with this points .

atleast it's not over 30 . Atleast i'm not THAT dumb ...

and that's my humble score . no one wants to fail a subject but i have to be realistic dont ya think so ...

my art and english are GOOD ... SERIOUSLY NOT KIDDING but since Mr M says i'm gonna fail my art , OKI DOKI THEN and since i lost all the confidence , i just counted my English points at a 6 .

oh wait , i should have counted a 7 for art too so that means , 30 in total .

yay

yes , you guys can finally call me stupid and i'll agree with it woohoo .

so anyway , i've received this award from edusave ... i got a $200 voucher .

FTS . don't they come in cash ?

what will i do with a $200 voucher ?! BUY BOOKS ?! im sure it's Popular's .

or Times . Or any bookstores .

grr .

and i'm kinda surprised ... what did i do right in secondary school ?

i've been the stupidest girl in the whole wide world so why are you givin me that crap .

but it's okay , i will accept it :D

- - -

the SMRT "broke down" just now . TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED !

i heard about somebody breaking the window ...

lmao , seriously ?

and somebody said it was planned .

sigh , more stupid things happening here .

What's New .

stupid girl , stupid world woohoo let's make a song out of it .

what happened to me .

give me my brains back .

i don't want to be Patrick or Spongebob .

They are MORONS .

lmao , no offence intended .

<3 Rainn

worry

2011-12-14T05:23:00.000-08:00

really , really , really miss this outing . It was so fun !

Thanks to Kika especially for bringing the food and the mat cause I FORGOT TO .

HA HA .

And i just went in the water with my clothes on cause i'm cool like that .

I hope they're free on the week after next's . Maybe just fot a chill in the park or something !

i miss them loads ! Or maybe have dinner together ! that'll be great .

But i guess most of them are working and they would prolly be busy but it's okay .

I'm sure some of them are free like ME .

Free as a Birdy .

so i blogged yesterday and i got it all wrong . The N level results are gonna be out on next monday NOT this Friday . oops . Well , they confused me first so it's not entirely MY fault he he .

i think i'll most probably start work after the results ? Yeah it might seem a lil "late" to some people but i'm fine with it cause ... it's a new year ... so maybe i should start next year <--- okay i am NOT making sense .

okay so , results ... hmm ...

I think i'm not gonna do well .

you can't deny your own gut feeling . I am so SICK of being scared . Just come quick , results day .

I want to get my marks and see what i can do from there and if i can't do anything ...

the only way is to take private O's ...

But that'll be a complete waste of my bloody time cause what if i fail the second time round ?

I want to persue the arts and for me to get in an art school , i'll have to pass 5 subjects [ English is a must ].

If i get a C6 for all the subjects , is it considered a pass or a fail ?

It's a pass if i get a C6 for any subject ... L1R4 = 30 and WHERE THE HECK WILL I GO WITH A 30 .but then again , the art school stated " 5 passing subjects for o levels " so that means it's a PASS .

If i do "badly" for higher malay , i'm taking my past year results which is a B3 ...

At least there's a B somewhere ...

let's just hope i pass 5 subjects in all . But if i do pass all 6 , i'll be damn grateful .

I don't know what to think . I thought i had it you know . i studied hard , i worked hard , but anything can happen and my gut says i'm not gonna do well so we'll see .

I don't know how to face my parents if i do fail . :(

It's okay , i'll find a way .

I will not stop my education .

imagine ... me passing 4 subjects ... WTH MAN . it's just one subject away from passing .

And what if i failed the one by a one mark ? what if i got a D7 ?!

Wasted much ...

i will continue praying to God . I really want a pass .

Please . Lemme . Pass .

<3 Rainn

Never ending

2011-12-13T10:27:00.001-08:00

Currently on my bed ... It's 2am already and as usual , i don't sleep :( this is really bad . I will only sleep at 5am or even later ! Two days ago , i didn't even sleep ! I just laid there with my eyes wide open . Kira suggested sleepin pills ...

Usually at times like this , i would watch Mind Your Language on Youtube or 90210 or some other videos for my entertainment . I think i'm gonna watch more of em later but i feel like bloggin so bloggin it is ...

I've been tweetin less ... I don't really know why . Most of the times i'm on it but i won't tweet . I'll just read or answer to mentions or dm(s) . Maybe i AM startin to get a life . A real one , without the use of too much internet :D
Too much net ain't good y'know .
I am rarely on Facebook <--- duh . And i can totally live without it . Fb is just a place that only the "popular ones" are .. Well , entertained . The other people like ME won't even get entertained . If i were to post something like this , "like if you're still awake !" , i would prolly get one or two likes (from people who sympatizes) -_-
I don't get it . Why is everyone so desperate with having the most likes on their display pictures or statuses ... Or whatever crap ... And being popular on the net is actually nothing . Especially on Facebook :/

"hey isn't that the popular girl on facebook ?" <--- i wouldnt wanna be remembered that way ... Just saying

And most of the popular people are GIRLS . Good lookin ones to be exact . So once you're ugly , that's it , you won't stand a chance ...

With all the respect , there are a handful of not-so-pretty ones with so many likes (in terms of pics or status) ... So the society isn't THAT bad ...

I am beyond ugly so my facebook or twitter or even this blog is pretty much invisible . I don't really mind . I'd rather be with small groups of loving people as compared to big ones ...

So anyway , i hope most of us softballers are gonna be free on the 29th ! Training with Bedok Green Boys & also coach :) nothing better than to play softball with our beloved coach who stood by us for four complete years ! Ain't no way im gonna miss it !
But im not too sure if i'll be free or not on that day . It's still kinda early to confirm ...

Softball is a great sport . It really is . I confess , i wasn't really keen into softball but i tried it out and i ended up loving it and becomin the captain lf the team means a lot to me ...
I'm really grateful for the opportunity given ( okay i sound like im gonna make a speech ... )

Things will never be the same between my schoolmates and i but it's okay . I'm out of it ! Some people mean a lot to me & i can still afford to ask them out for meals or something but the others who treated me like shif , sorry , we will never be the same again . Ever . Well im sure they like It better that way . Well as they say , once a trust is broken , it's gone forever .

And right now , i trust God and only God . He knows what i'm going through and He is always with me .

Somehow i can't wait for 2012 . New year , meet new people , new everything . :) can't wait for 17 ! But ... I can totally wait for o level results . The N level results are comin out this Friday . I wish them all the best & i hope most of them go tk sec five !
I pray for everyone , every night , for good health & good results ... I do hope we get to get out of school officially , with beamin faces instead of gloomy ones .

For once , let me succeed , God . Let me pass .

Hopefully i'll get to enter an art school :) where i can paint and draw all day long and there are no restrictions or whatsoever to what i can do ..
Art is my life . . .

I took a huge risk for o level art and if i do get a bad grade , im still gonna sign myself up for an art school . I know myself well and i know that Art is where i belong .

I can draw everyday if you want me to . Just give me a pen and a paper .

Not everyone understands my kinda art but it's okay . This time , i won't be judged cus im drawin for myself not for Cambridge or Oxford or whoever .

I will never stop blogging :) even im busy , i'll still make time to blog . I've had this blog for so many years & i dont plan to close it down cos "im tok busy" . This is like , my live journal & i believe that my story deserves to be heard . ( not that my life is interestin in any way ... )

I will do myself a favour this time and i will get a real life . It's time .

<3 Rainn

When she was just a girl ...

2011-12-12T07:43:00.000-08:00

new pictures , bad quality lol .

yes , i know , i've been abandoning my blog for a while . I can't help it ! :(

i spent lesser time on the computer nowadays .

I've been tweeting less too .

And also , as usual , i've been busy with my cousins and also some of our friends .

I wouldn't hang out with them lasttime cause i was a rather busy girl with O levels and everything else but i do hang out with them now . It's fun , actually . I don't "thon" and shits cause i still don't find understand how it works .

We hang out and drown ourselves in music and sometimes we'll just share epic stories .

i <3 my people !

so anyway , we had to deal with a rather large " problem " today .

I'm just glad that everything's " fine " now . I hope the people involved learnt their lesson .

So anyway ...

maybe going shopping with Mom this week :D My mom is so lucky . She got to meet the stars from Suria cause she did make up for them just now . She got to take pictures with Rahayu , Nurul Aini ... Rila Melati ?

I mean , i rarely watch Suria but i do know who they are . . .

Yesterday's flea market was s t u p i d . we had SO LITTLE customers . After much of waiting , we packed up and went home . I think it was because of the rain ...

the other booths packed up too cause they gave up waiting .

The flea market we had before this was so much better ! They had dj[s] and we had SO MANY CUSTOMERS .

>.<

Anyway , i've had weird dreams about my getting my results and stuff ...

it was weird cause in my dream , my results were ... missing .

Seriously , everyone had to find it and when i went downstairs , i was in my primary school .

what a retarded dream but it gave me goose bumps anyway .

I don't want missing results AND i don't want to fail .

*sigh*

Dad says he'll buy my a canvas ! I think i've blogged about this part . I can't wait .

I really need something to do else i'll just rot and die here .

Okay kidding , i'm enjoying my holiday 100% .

I feel FREE .

like , finally .

it's like " HEY BITCH , IM FREE AND I CAN DO ANYTHING WOOHOO "

i don't miss school at all . I don't miss anything about school not even the people in it .

i am just so happy that i can give you a big , big smile .

i just can't believe , school's out and if i do have to step in that hell again ... i wouldn't know what to say .

i'd rather die than enter that place .

n e v a !

i am happy cause ... well ... i just am .

i am out of reach from every sucker who backstabbed me like they're boss . lol

i'm living my life now so suck it

lagi pon , sekarang keluar pon , mana nak ajak kan ...

i will make it .

make it where exactly ? i don't know but i'll make sure i do what i want to do and this time , ain't no one is gonna stop me from reaching my goals .

<3 Rainn

will blog frequently !

food makes me h a p p y

2011-12-09T05:36:00.000-08:00

okay so i have to make do with the stupid picture cause i ran out of pics ... :(

I just got home from a Night Market at Tampines ! It was a lil disappointing cause it was so...o boring .

And the prices increased . Prices of what , you may ask . EVERYTHING .

>.<

I wanted to try the Donor <--- i don't know what they call it here but back in Istanbul , they call it Donor ..

But it was expensive for sucha small thing and so we bought burgers instead .

i'm currently broke so yes .

and i don't like asking my parents for money even though i can't help it sometimes .

So after walking around and getting our food , we went home . Mom followed us too and she got her scarves [ as usual ] i don't know how many scarves she own !

And have you seen our house ?! It is FULL of wedding clothes ! It's like a boutique here and i can't breathe from all the clothes hanging . Okay , i might exaggerate on that part . ha ha .

but seriously , i don't know HOW she got the outfits from but you must see it for yourself !

They are all legendary clothes . The wedding clothes that no one in the 21st century would wear .

Nick & i got extra curious so we took one out and he tried on the man's and it looked Great !

It's like , Michael Jackson's top . You know , those Michael Jackson tops ..

I really don't know how to explain it ...

It's cool and all but it's taking up our living room space .

seriously .

so anyway , i've been busy hangin out with my best cousins !

I won't know what i'll do without them . I was super pissed that day cause they came late and i was already there and everyone knows HOW MUCH I HATE WAITING ON PEOPLE .

But it was okay cause atleast they turned up unlike those people who freakin stood me up and i had to go home <---- not mentioning any names but you know who you are , cruel people hmph .

i feel so free .

i don't want my holidays to end . I can totally wait for results day cause i am really , really scared of the outcome . I might not do well and i kept thinkin about it EVERY night .

*sigh*

The only way to find out is to wait for the results day itself .

I hope , i SO hope it'll be anything under 30 .

And i must totally pass my English <--- i've never failed English but you may never know .

God , why am i so negative ? Guess i must prepare myself for the worst .

Enough of results talk , let's talk about Youtube !

SO , i uploaded one video on youtube of Bam and i hangin out and "singing" .

It's a 10 minute long video . YES TEN MINUTES .

HA HA .

Oh well , who cares .

i didn't even watch the video till the end cause it was too long so if no one watches it , i'd totally understand .

Plus my Youtube Channel is so ... o empty so i just randomly uploaded one crappy vid to make up for it .

HE HE .

i'm new on Youtube . I don't know why i've never made a channel .

All this while i just go to Youtube to watch videos without having an account .

so yeah .

anyway look at this !

THIS IS SO SAD :'(

DONT WORRY LITTLE GIRL , YOU'RE ALREADY A STAR IN OUR EYES <3

Rachel should have stayed on Xfactor but one of em has to go and it was her so ...

don't go hatin on Nicole . Wasn't her fault .

Dad says Josh Kragic is gonna win the X-factor . I don't mind . But i like Chris Rene and i really , really think he's gonna win . Melanie and Marcus are great singers too but Chris Rene stands out the most [ to me ] .

Young homie whatchu trippin on !

i am very sure i'm gonna cry when i watch X-factor later . I missed the first telecast here so ...

i'm just gonna wait for the night time one .

- - -

i left the house without my phone just now . ha ha . I totally didn't notice it till later on the bus .

i can totally live without a phone but i don't wanna risk any emergencies so yeah .

i really want to paint >-- random .

But Dad says he'll get me a canvas soon . yeah man .

can't wait !

<3 Rainn

Please let my future be bright , dear God .

Please let me and my friends pass our O levels well .

Good enough for a future school in a poly or an art school please .

I trust God . No one Else .

Every teardrop is a waterfall

2011-12-07T00:51:00.000-08:00

so we hung out at Bam's crib yesterday ! The first picture was accidental cause i was supposed to record a video . That explains the unglam face of mine HA HA .

But i LOVE the delicious shade of pink on her wall !

Can i paint my room pink too ?

I'm not a BIG fan of pink but it looks good on videos ... ha ha .

So if i wanna make covers , atleast my walls will look great .

Nowadays , i prefer to tie up my hair cause it's kinda LONG now and ... it's annoying .

To prevent myself from cutting it , i tie it up .

and the colour is a huge fail .

But it's okay . I don't really mind . I'll recolour it anyway so yeah ...

So anyway ...

i learnt new songs on the piano / keyboard !

Coldplay related [ obviously ] .

Love these two songs : Paradise & Every Teardrop is a Waterfall .

what can i say ? I love Coldplay .

We hung out till night . Played guitar , keyboard , sang , ate .

It was fun ! it's been a while since i went to their house ! I had maggi with hotdogs ! <--- love .

It's been such a long time since i had maggi and i felt like eating it with HOTDOGS especially so we ate .

We had french fries , chicken cutlets like the ones in school , more hotdogs ... and chips !

Not a big fan of chips but i ate some .

I've been skipping a lot of meals lately .

I don't know why i lost all appetite to eat but i forced myself to get something in my tummy cause i don't wanna die of being anaroxic . >.<

okay kidding . I'm FAR from skinny so that means i'm FAR from being anaroxic .

Yesterday night was seriously ... i can't find the words to describe it . I came home with a terrible tummy ache and i had to go to the ladies a couple of times .

And after that , i totally don't feel like eating anything ...

which explains why i've had no meals today .

It's not that i don't want to eat . I do . i mean , who the fuck doesn't want to enjoy delicious meals cooked by our own parents ?

BUT ...

i don't have the stinkin appetite . It's really getting on my nerves .

i don't even feel like eating Mcspicy !!! <------- that's a FIRST .

decided to stay in today cause ... i'm a lazy bum . Been spending a lot of time with my awesome cousins .

Im not kidding when i say they're awesome . You'll never find people like them .

So far , no work . : (

IT's fine actually cause i don't have to go shopping now or do anything .

It's a lil odd NOT to be doing anything though . Usually i'll go out , get a frappe or something and study my ass out but now , i'm so free that i can do anything .

Maybe i should start on my portfolio ... or maybe not . Cause after all , i need good results to enter an Art school . So if i don't get good results , i'm doom-ed . For life .

and ...

the results ....

are ...

gonna ...

be ...

released ...

on ...

my ...

BIRTHDAY .

let's all hope that luck is with me and that my birthday will be a good one .

i really , really want to paint .

okay that was random but seriously . Give me some paints and a canvas and i'll start makin art on it .

lol .

<3 Rainn

follow me on Twitter !

Rainn_Ing

or add me up on Facebook ...

or ...

die .

ha ha ha .

kidding .